Kinda aggrivated right now. It just seems like giving your word means nothing these days. There are just some people that have made it hard to trust that they will do something any more.
So I had an excellent blog post last night. Then my laptop freaked out and froze up and I lost it all. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. I really need to build this new computer. That will be a good day.
So I got a digital camera for Christmas. I am rather excited about it. Plenty of pictures to come.
Went to see The Chronicles of Narnia: the Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe yesterday with the family. I rather enjoyed it and would recommend it to all. Another thing I have been enjoying a lot lately, "Three Nights in August: Strategy, Heartbreak, and Joy Inside the Mind of a Manager" by Tony LaRussa and Buzz Bissinger. Such an awesome book. A must read for any baseball fan out there. You never realize just how much strategy is thought about over the course of a season by a manager and what integral part of baseball the manager is.
Rather aggrivated with other people right now. Grrrrrr. I would say more, but it would only make things worse.
I will just leave you with some more Rent to rock out to. I love these lyrics.
There Is No Future - There Is No Past
Thank God This Moments Not The Last
There's Only Us
There's Only This
Forget Regret
Or Life Is Yours To Miss
No Other Road
No Other Way
No Day But Today
I Can't Control (Will I Lose My)
My Destiny (Dignity)
I Trust My Soul (Will Someone)
My Only Goal (Care)
Is Just To Be (Will I Wake)
(Tomorrow)
Without You (From This)
The Hand Gropes (Nightmare)
The Ear Hears
The Pulse Beats (There's Only Now)
Life Goes On (There's Only Here)
But I'm Gone (Give In To Love)
Cause I Die (Or Live In Fear)
Without You (No Other Path)
I Die Without You (No Other Way)
I Die Without You (No Day But Today)
No Day But Today (No Day But Today)
I Die Without You (No Day But Today)
No Day But Today
Tuesday, December 27, 2005
Saturday, December 24, 2005
First Straw on a Chrstmas Eve
Almost Christmas. Kinda excited. Watching Phantom of the Opera with my family. Such a wonderful movie. I love it. Some how my parents made it this far through life without ever seeing any version of the Phantom. I am happy to help them with this.
Got to talk to my older brother Chad tonight. It was nice. I think this is going to be a wonderful Christmas.
Hung out with Amy today. It was nice as always to see her again. We shopped for my brother and then just hung out at her house for a while. We didn't do much over there, but it was just nice to hang out for a while. It's always fun to see her little brothers too. They are like a second set of little brothers to me. I love them. And they are still small enough that I can wrestle them, without it becoming competitive. Although with my real brothers, not much is not competitive.
Last night, we went to the Main Street Jazz & Blues club to see Farmer's Tan Market, a band of some old West grads including Ian Randall, Jordan Bay and Paxton Rodgers, all good friends of mine in high school. It was nice to see them. It was crazy there. Like a high school reunion, nearly every person I hung out with at West came out for the show. It was great. Even Danny O'Donnell and John Mackin were there, reuniting our old junior high group. Kinda crazy.
Still trying to figure some things out, but they are looking better. Got to talk to my little sister the other night about it and I think I have some things figured out.
Played Jimmy in chess tonight. It was fun. The kid is getting better. I helped him read the board a little better and I think it helped him a little. I probably sound like a nerd, but I have missed playing a good game of chess. I should get my hands on a board. If I do, any takers?
I've been talking to Erin O'Connor a lot online, lately. It's been fun. Turns out we have a lot in common, besides that whole she's nuts about country thing. Just a good time talking, and it's nice.
Well time to get some sleep. I'll leave you with some 311 to rock out to, but for now, Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night.
Oh a whole new way of looking at things
The way you react to phone rings
The way it feels when you just let it flow
Sometimes I wonder just how it could be
You take every bit before we see it off the rails
I think that you should know
You never cease to amaze me
You keep me from going crazy
And that's one thing I know for sure
Sometimes I see just how it all will be
Take every bit it's so easy the first straw
And this I know for sure
The first straw
So small it seemed impossible
The next straw
Vanished like shooting stars that fall
The last straw
There's no reason for getting there at all
The last straw can land in your mix
Your best day could be apocalypse
Nobody pay attention to the first straw
It seems the last one is all we ever saw
The first straw's a metaphore I pick up myself
It tells me something by showing me something else
I think that you should know
Everyone reacts when it gets to the weight of breaking their back
I won't let that be us cause the long side never gave back
Got to talk to my older brother Chad tonight. It was nice. I think this is going to be a wonderful Christmas.
Hung out with Amy today. It was nice as always to see her again. We shopped for my brother and then just hung out at her house for a while. We didn't do much over there, but it was just nice to hang out for a while. It's always fun to see her little brothers too. They are like a second set of little brothers to me. I love them. And they are still small enough that I can wrestle them, without it becoming competitive. Although with my real brothers, not much is not competitive.
Last night, we went to the Main Street Jazz & Blues club to see Farmer's Tan Market, a band of some old West grads including Ian Randall, Jordan Bay and Paxton Rodgers, all good friends of mine in high school. It was nice to see them. It was crazy there. Like a high school reunion, nearly every person I hung out with at West came out for the show. It was great. Even Danny O'Donnell and John Mackin were there, reuniting our old junior high group. Kinda crazy.
Still trying to figure some things out, but they are looking better. Got to talk to my little sister the other night about it and I think I have some things figured out.
Played Jimmy in chess tonight. It was fun. The kid is getting better. I helped him read the board a little better and I think it helped him a little. I probably sound like a nerd, but I have missed playing a good game of chess. I should get my hands on a board. If I do, any takers?
I've been talking to Erin O'Connor a lot online, lately. It's been fun. Turns out we have a lot in common, besides that whole she's nuts about country thing. Just a good time talking, and it's nice.
Well time to get some sleep. I'll leave you with some 311 to rock out to, but for now, Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night.
Oh a whole new way of looking at things
The way you react to phone rings
The way it feels when you just let it flow
Sometimes I wonder just how it could be
You take every bit before we see it off the rails
I think that you should know
You never cease to amaze me
You keep me from going crazy
And that's one thing I know for sure
Sometimes I see just how it all will be
Take every bit it's so easy the first straw
And this I know for sure
The first straw
So small it seemed impossible
The next straw
Vanished like shooting stars that fall
The last straw
There's no reason for getting there at all
The last straw can land in your mix
Your best day could be apocalypse
Nobody pay attention to the first straw
It seems the last one is all we ever saw
The first straw's a metaphore I pick up myself
It tells me something by showing me something else
I think that you should know
Everyone reacts when it gets to the weight of breaking their back
I won't let that be us cause the long side never gave back
Monday, December 19, 2005
Santa Fe on a Monday Night
Still waiting on comments from a few people. Just so that you, I know who reads my blog, so please comment and then reflect on your own year.
So the Guys & Dolls cast list came out and it is kind of sad. Not sad because of who is on it, but because once again Rose is doing one of my all-time favorite shows and my name is not on it. Guys & Dolls is my favorite musical. Ever. My favorite play is Picasso and I had to watch my school do that and not be able to be a part of it. That's hard to do, especially when I introduced the show to the director because I originally wanted to direct it. And now Rose finally doe my favorite musical and I can't be a part of it. It's gonna be hard watching all of my friends go to play practice for my favorite show while I have to stay home. Maybe I can convince Bunny to let me be her assistant director or something. Someone to bounce ideas off of, to help organize, just a second hand man. We'll see what she says. Maybe I'll wait to see what kind of work load I have next semester first, but if it's anything close to this semester, I'll be bored out of my mind anyway.
A lot of new freshmen on this show. Hopefully this means there is a lot of new talent for RDC. I should tap into that for the 24 hour play festival.
Speaking of the 24 hour play festival, I am really excited about how many people have committed to it. We are 2 people away from being able to do 6 shows. We have 7 writers committed, a few who have never written a play, but other genres of creative writing so I gave them a prop and a cast to write a show for for practice. I can't wait to see what they come up with. We have quite a creative group. Should be great.
I am getting tired of this. I am not your mother. Why is doing your own dishes such a hard thing? Cups should not sit on the counter for a couple weeks. Take just a little responsibility for what you do. Everyone is so damned concerned about doing their share and only their share that they rarely even do their share. This isn't a hard concept. We are in friggin' college. How hard is this? You may not be the culprit all the time, but you are by no means completely innocent.
Tomorrow is Steak and Beer night. Sounds like a good time. And then I get to drive home. I am looking forward to this. Being home should be a nice change of pace. I have so many people to see, so little time. It will also be nice to have some quality family time.
It amazes me the number of long term relationships that ended this month or recently. I almost feel like my world is crashing down around me. I am just so confused.
Been in such a 311 mood. I have so much of their music from Katie that I have never listened to. So I started going through all of my music last night and found that as much as I love quite a few of their song, I don't particularly care for quite a few of them as well. In fact there are very few that I am middle ground on. I either love it or don't care to listen to it.
I have many new year's resolutions, although I doubt I'll ever post a few of them. But I'll post some of them later. Now isn't the right time for it. But I still want to see your reflections on the year and your favorite memory with me this year. I know who you are.
I should get some sleep, but I will leave you with some Rent to rock out to.
New York City
Uh huh
Center of the universe
Sing it, girl
Times are shitty, but I'm pretty sure they can't get worse
I hear you
It's a comfort to know
When you're singing the hit the road blues
That anywhere else you could possibly go
After New York would be
A pleasure cruise
Now you're talking!
Well I'm thwarted by a metaphysic puzzle
And I'm sick of grading papers, that I know
And I'm shouting in my sleep, I need a muzzle
All this misery pays no salary, so
Let's open up a restaurant in Santa Fe
Oh, sunny Santa Fe would be nice
Let's open up a restaurant in Santa Fe
And leave this to the roaches and mice
You teach?
I teach- computer age philosophy
But my students would rather watch TV
America
America!
You're a sensitive aesthete
Brush the sauce onto the meat
You could make the menu sparkle with rhyme
You could drum a gentle drum
I could seat guests as they come
Chatting not about heidegger, but wine
Let's open up a restaurant in Santa Fe
Our labors would reap financial gains
Gains, gains, gains
We'll open up a restaurant in Santa Fe
And save from devastation our brains
Save our brains
We'll pack up all our junk and fly so far away
Devote ourselves to projects that sell
We'll open up a restaurant in Santa Fe
Forget this cold Bohemian hell
Do you know the way to Santa Fe?
You know, tumbleweeds... prairie dogs...
Yeah
So the Guys & Dolls cast list came out and it is kind of sad. Not sad because of who is on it, but because once again Rose is doing one of my all-time favorite shows and my name is not on it. Guys & Dolls is my favorite musical. Ever. My favorite play is Picasso and I had to watch my school do that and not be able to be a part of it. That's hard to do, especially when I introduced the show to the director because I originally wanted to direct it. And now Rose finally doe my favorite musical and I can't be a part of it. It's gonna be hard watching all of my friends go to play practice for my favorite show while I have to stay home. Maybe I can convince Bunny to let me be her assistant director or something. Someone to bounce ideas off of, to help organize, just a second hand man. We'll see what she says. Maybe I'll wait to see what kind of work load I have next semester first, but if it's anything close to this semester, I'll be bored out of my mind anyway.
A lot of new freshmen on this show. Hopefully this means there is a lot of new talent for RDC. I should tap into that for the 24 hour play festival.
Speaking of the 24 hour play festival, I am really excited about how many people have committed to it. We are 2 people away from being able to do 6 shows. We have 7 writers committed, a few who have never written a play, but other genres of creative writing so I gave them a prop and a cast to write a show for for practice. I can't wait to see what they come up with. We have quite a creative group. Should be great.
I am getting tired of this. I am not your mother. Why is doing your own dishes such a hard thing? Cups should not sit on the counter for a couple weeks. Take just a little responsibility for what you do. Everyone is so damned concerned about doing their share and only their share that they rarely even do their share. This isn't a hard concept. We are in friggin' college. How hard is this? You may not be the culprit all the time, but you are by no means completely innocent.
Tomorrow is Steak and Beer night. Sounds like a good time. And then I get to drive home. I am looking forward to this. Being home should be a nice change of pace. I have so many people to see, so little time. It will also be nice to have some quality family time.
It amazes me the number of long term relationships that ended this month or recently. I almost feel like my world is crashing down around me. I am just so confused.
Been in such a 311 mood. I have so much of their music from Katie that I have never listened to. So I started going through all of my music last night and found that as much as I love quite a few of their song, I don't particularly care for quite a few of them as well. In fact there are very few that I am middle ground on. I either love it or don't care to listen to it.
I have many new year's resolutions, although I doubt I'll ever post a few of them. But I'll post some of them later. Now isn't the right time for it. But I still want to see your reflections on the year and your favorite memory with me this year. I know who you are.
I should get some sleep, but I will leave you with some Rent to rock out to.
New York City
Uh huh
Center of the universe
Sing it, girl
Times are shitty, but I'm pretty sure they can't get worse
I hear you
It's a comfort to know
When you're singing the hit the road blues
That anywhere else you could possibly go
After New York would be
A pleasure cruise
Now you're talking!
Well I'm thwarted by a metaphysic puzzle
And I'm sick of grading papers, that I know
And I'm shouting in my sleep, I need a muzzle
All this misery pays no salary, so
Let's open up a restaurant in Santa Fe
Oh, sunny Santa Fe would be nice
Let's open up a restaurant in Santa Fe
And leave this to the roaches and mice
You teach?
I teach- computer age philosophy
But my students would rather watch TV
America
America!
You're a sensitive aesthete
Brush the sauce onto the meat
You could make the menu sparkle with rhyme
You could drum a gentle drum
I could seat guests as they come
Chatting not about heidegger, but wine
Let's open up a restaurant in Santa Fe
Our labors would reap financial gains
Gains, gains, gains
We'll open up a restaurant in Santa Fe
And save from devastation our brains
Save our brains
We'll pack up all our junk and fly so far away
Devote ourselves to projects that sell
We'll open up a restaurant in Santa Fe
Forget this cold Bohemian hell
Do you know the way to Santa Fe?
You know, tumbleweeds... prairie dogs...
Yeah
Monday, December 12, 2005
Poor Jud is Daid, Poor Jud Fry is Daid......
So Sunday Night Dinner is dead. How sad and how it will be missed. Sunday Night Dinner was that time of the weekend we all looked forward to and when things just slowed down getting ready to return to the weekdays. When six close friends could just sit down and enjoy a fabulous meal and one of these friends could show off their mad cooking skills or try out a new recipe. Every week it was different, but always something to look forward to. And now it rests in peace. I don't want to insult the newly lain SND, but I would like to start another dinner group. I kinda saw SND's death coming, making it much easier to get over. And I want to begin a new group, fresh. Any takers? Doesn't have to be on Sundays. Let me know what works best for you. :-)
As I was driving back yesterday, I was reflecting on this year and I would have to say it has been a good year. Got a real job in CS and live in my own house (as in mot my parents'). I fell in love and then suffered a hard break up, at which my friends showed me just how much they cared by dropping everything to help me through that night. Sure they had better things to do than go grab a few smoothies and chill on the dock, especially since it was around 1 am and they both had to be up early for work the next morning. But that's marking of a true friend, who will see you in need and drop everything else and even sacrifice sleep, for you. I also made great connections in my field and started a job in the Sports Information department that has made me think more about my future. I have applied for a dream job with the Cardinals (still crossing my fingers for that one). I have reconnected with so many old friends through theFacebook and had great times with new and old friends alike. I watched my Cardinals have an amazing year and fall short in the playoffs, but have someone to go nuts with me during it, even though I'm in Terre Haute and rumor has it she has an Astros tattoo, but I have never seen it. I turned 21 this year and felt old as can be. I watched a little brother graduate from high school and leave home for the Air Force Academy. I participated in a one of a kind theatre project, got a couple friends involved and began a project to bring it to Rose. I directed and produced my first full-length play in the form of a dinner theatre and directed and produced one of the best evening of one acts Rose-Hulman has ever seen. Thrown some of the best cast parties RDC has seen as well. Actually went somewhere for spring break and had a blast there for about the best spring break ever. Swam in the ocean without being stung b a jellyfish, woot. Switched schools and majors once again. Won awards for my work on the media guides, including a best in the nation, something to be very proud of.
Now I pass it to you. Everyone who reads this, please post a comment of your favorite memory with me this year and then reflect on the year in your blog. It's been a great year, so this should be fun.
Stolen from Elaine:
Open iTunes/iPod or Windows Media Player(or Winamp) to answer the following. Go to your library. Answer, no matter how embarrassing it is.
How many songs?
2251
Days worth of music?
5.9
Size of music?
16.09 GB
Sort by song title:
-First song: 17 Magazine - Relient K
-Last Song: Youth of the Nation - P.O.D.
Sort by time:
-Shortest Song: 0:07 Speech: Paul - the Beatles
-Longest Song: 18:05 Hilikus - Incubus
Sort by album:
-First Album: 1 - the Beatles
-Last Album: Young & the Hopeless - Good Charlotte
Top Five Most Played Songs:
1. Creatures (For a While) - 311
2. Other Side of Things - 311
3. Crack the Code - 311
4. Reconsider Everything - 311
5. The Phrase that Pays - The Academy Is...
First song that comes up on Shuffle:
The Miracle - Queen
Search...
"Sex", how many songs come up?
67
"Blood", how many songs come up?
5
"Death", how many songs come up?
2
"Love", how many songs come up?
76
"You", how many songs come up?
235
"It", how many songs come up?
553
"f@#%", how many songs come up?
0
"Existentialism", how many songs come up?
0
[Note:] Since this isn't a normal post, I will not be leaving lyrics, but will return to the normal format next post.
As I was driving back yesterday, I was reflecting on this year and I would have to say it has been a good year. Got a real job in CS and live in my own house (as in mot my parents'). I fell in love and then suffered a hard break up, at which my friends showed me just how much they cared by dropping everything to help me through that night. Sure they had better things to do than go grab a few smoothies and chill on the dock, especially since it was around 1 am and they both had to be up early for work the next morning. But that's marking of a true friend, who will see you in need and drop everything else and even sacrifice sleep, for you. I also made great connections in my field and started a job in the Sports Information department that has made me think more about my future. I have applied for a dream job with the Cardinals (still crossing my fingers for that one). I have reconnected with so many old friends through theFacebook and had great times with new and old friends alike. I watched my Cardinals have an amazing year and fall short in the playoffs, but have someone to go nuts with me during it, even though I'm in Terre Haute and rumor has it she has an Astros tattoo, but I have never seen it. I turned 21 this year and felt old as can be. I watched a little brother graduate from high school and leave home for the Air Force Academy. I participated in a one of a kind theatre project, got a couple friends involved and began a project to bring it to Rose. I directed and produced my first full-length play in the form of a dinner theatre and directed and produced one of the best evening of one acts Rose-Hulman has ever seen. Thrown some of the best cast parties RDC has seen as well. Actually went somewhere for spring break and had a blast there for about the best spring break ever. Swam in the ocean without being stung b a jellyfish, woot. Switched schools and majors once again. Won awards for my work on the media guides, including a best in the nation, something to be very proud of.
Now I pass it to you. Everyone who reads this, please post a comment of your favorite memory with me this year and then reflect on the year in your blog. It's been a great year, so this should be fun.
Stolen from Elaine:
Open iTunes/iPod or Windows Media Player(or Winamp) to answer the following. Go to your library. Answer, no matter how embarrassing it is.
How many songs?
2251
Days worth of music?
5.9
Size of music?
16.09 GB
Sort by song title:
-First song: 17 Magazine - Relient K
-Last Song: Youth of the Nation - P.O.D.
Sort by time:
-Shortest Song: 0:07 Speech: Paul - the Beatles
-Longest Song: 18:05 Hilikus - Incubus
Sort by album:
-First Album: 1 - the Beatles
-Last Album: Young & the Hopeless - Good Charlotte
Top Five Most Played Songs:
1. Creatures (For a While) - 311
2. Other Side of Things - 311
3. Crack the Code - 311
4. Reconsider Everything - 311
5. The Phrase that Pays - The Academy Is...
First song that comes up on Shuffle:
The Miracle - Queen
Search...
"Sex", how many songs come up?
67
"Blood", how many songs come up?
5
"Death", how many songs come up?
2
"Love", how many songs come up?
76
"You", how many songs come up?
235
"It", how many songs come up?
553
"f@#%", how many songs come up?
0
"Existentialism", how many songs come up?
0
[Note:] Since this isn't a normal post, I will not be leaving lyrics, but will return to the normal format next post.
Sunday, December 11, 2005
Just One on a Sunday Night
How someone could be so cruel to someone so sweet simply boggles my mind. How could the sight of her tears not make you just melt? I wish I knew what to do. I want to just break him.
So this weekend overall was a good weekend. It was fun meeting Anne. How much she reminded me of Jennah was scary. That's right, Jennah, if you are reading this, I found your long lost twin!! Their faces are similar, but their smiles and laugh are identical. It was so weird. And their personalities were very similar as well. It was uncanny.
So that's what a real dance team looks like. Illinois College's dance team was excellent. Their routines were reminiscant of my old high school's team that regularly were the best in the state of Illinois. And at timeouts they had dances to quick 30 seconds bits of songs on the sidelines. And it looked great. They even did a dance to "Sadie Hawkins Dance" during one of the timeouts. I finally got to see Amy dance, and was very glad I did.
So I don't have class all week till Firday when I have my CS final. Who's up for a trip IC for Amy's play Wednesday night? It will just be a one-nighter, we will return here that night after the show. I really want to go, but it's a long drive solo in one night. So if you want to go, let me know and we'll do this.
Colts are 13-0, baby. To the remaining three teams, bring it.
Wow, the Rams sucked it up, again. At least the Colts are doing well.
So applied for my dream internship with the Cardinals today. MLB.com has an opportunity to do what I am currently doing at Rose, but with the Cardinals. If I get this, I will be on cloud nine. Keeping my fingers crossed.
Illinois has some messed up city names. Illiopolis?? And I definately passed a sign that sign Home-6 mi. How did they know?
Wow, a 16 year old with two kids, one of which is 3. I mention to someone that she obviously didn't learn with the first kid and was attacked. Learned?? Do you think she chose that???? No she didn't choose to get pregnant, but she did make some decisions that got her pregnant in the first place. I understand people make mistakes, but after you make a mistake that causes you to be a parent before high school, wouldn't you think back and be like what actions got me here in the first place, and maybe I need to stop that or at least be more careful about it. You would think you would better understand the consequences of your actions when you already have one child. And yes, unless it was a rape, she made decisions causing her to be pregnant. She wasn't walking home from school and magically pregnant.
It amazes me the things that people do sometimes and with little respect for other people's belongings.
Well, I think I will leave you with some Hoobastank that I have been enjoying. Enjoy.
I wanna live
I wanna leave
I wanna open up and breath
I wanna go
I wanna be
I wanna feel it constantly
Gotta show
Gotta stay
I've gotta feeling that won't go away
I've gotta know
If they got away
My oppertunities
Just one,
Chance is all I ever wanted
Just one,
Time I'd like to win the game
From now on,
I'd take the chance if I can have it
Just one, just one
I need to think
I need to feed
I need to see if I still bleed
I need a place
I need a time
Cause I need to step outside that line
Gonna give
Gonna take
I'm gonna scream till I'm awake
I'm gonna push
Gonna pull
Open up the door
Just one,
Chance is all I ever wanted
Just one,
Time I'd like to win the game
From now on,
I'd take the chance if I can have it
Just one, just one
And if I knew
When the door was open
I'd go through
I would go on through
And I can say
What I do never be the same
Never be the same
Just one,
Chance is all I ever wanted
Just one,
Time I'd like to win the game
From now on,
I'd take the chance if I can have it
Just one, just one
Just one,
I'd take the chance if I can have it
Just one,
I'd take the chance if I can have it
Just one,
I'd take the chance if I can have it
Just one, just one
So this weekend overall was a good weekend. It was fun meeting Anne. How much she reminded me of Jennah was scary. That's right, Jennah, if you are reading this, I found your long lost twin!! Their faces are similar, but their smiles and laugh are identical. It was so weird. And their personalities were very similar as well. It was uncanny.
So that's what a real dance team looks like. Illinois College's dance team was excellent. Their routines were reminiscant of my old high school's team that regularly were the best in the state of Illinois. And at timeouts they had dances to quick 30 seconds bits of songs on the sidelines. And it looked great. They even did a dance to "Sadie Hawkins Dance" during one of the timeouts. I finally got to see Amy dance, and was very glad I did.
So I don't have class all week till Firday when I have my CS final. Who's up for a trip IC for Amy's play Wednesday night? It will just be a one-nighter, we will return here that night after the show. I really want to go, but it's a long drive solo in one night. So if you want to go, let me know and we'll do this.
Colts are 13-0, baby. To the remaining three teams, bring it.
Wow, the Rams sucked it up, again. At least the Colts are doing well.
So applied for my dream internship with the Cardinals today. MLB.com has an opportunity to do what I am currently doing at Rose, but with the Cardinals. If I get this, I will be on cloud nine. Keeping my fingers crossed.
Illinois has some messed up city names. Illiopolis?? And I definately passed a sign that sign Home-6 mi. How did they know?
Wow, a 16 year old with two kids, one of which is 3. I mention to someone that she obviously didn't learn with the first kid and was attacked. Learned?? Do you think she chose that???? No she didn't choose to get pregnant, but she did make some decisions that got her pregnant in the first place. I understand people make mistakes, but after you make a mistake that causes you to be a parent before high school, wouldn't you think back and be like what actions got me here in the first place, and maybe I need to stop that or at least be more careful about it. You would think you would better understand the consequences of your actions when you already have one child. And yes, unless it was a rape, she made decisions causing her to be pregnant. She wasn't walking home from school and magically pregnant.
It amazes me the things that people do sometimes and with little respect for other people's belongings.
Well, I think I will leave you with some Hoobastank that I have been enjoying. Enjoy.
I wanna live
I wanna leave
I wanna open up and breath
I wanna go
I wanna be
I wanna feel it constantly
Gotta show
Gotta stay
I've gotta feeling that won't go away
I've gotta know
If they got away
My oppertunities
Just one,
Chance is all I ever wanted
Just one,
Time I'd like to win the game
From now on,
I'd take the chance if I can have it
Just one, just one
I need to think
I need to feed
I need to see if I still bleed
I need a place
I need a time
Cause I need to step outside that line
Gonna give
Gonna take
I'm gonna scream till I'm awake
I'm gonna push
Gonna pull
Open up the door
Just one,
Chance is all I ever wanted
Just one,
Time I'd like to win the game
From now on,
I'd take the chance if I can have it
Just one, just one
And if I knew
When the door was open
I'd go through
I would go on through
And I can say
What I do never be the same
Never be the same
Just one,
Chance is all I ever wanted
Just one,
Time I'd like to win the game
From now on,
I'd take the chance if I can have it
Just one, just one
Just one,
I'd take the chance if I can have it
Just one,
I'd take the chance if I can have it
Just one,
I'd take the chance if I can have it
Just one, just one
Sunday, December 04, 2005
Fire on a Sunday Night
So I may have done a stupid thing. Hmmmmm, well you live, you learn.
I haven't been to Fountain Square in a long time. Who is up for it? We wil get something together before Christmas break.
If there is one math I like best, I think its Discrete Mathematics (Disco). I wish I had taken that over Linear Algebra last year. Disco is like the math of common sense. I love it.
Wow, I am definately a nerd.
Ever start talking with someone from high school that you didn't talk with much when you were in high school with them and now you talk all the time making you wonder why the hell you didn't hang out more when you lived in the same city?
I need a good book for break. Any suggestions?
Apple-banana bread. Who would have thought. Kudos to Nick for making it. 25 points to you.
Hmmmm, its been a while since I've given out some points. So here we go. 50 points to Mike for becoming 21 and a blast this weekend. 40 points to Rabbi for saving your own ass by being too drunk (who woulda thought?). 30 points to all who came to the party last night. 35 points to Amy for a great phone call and nice talk last night. 50 points for anyone who came to our party from out of town. Those are true friends who don't let distance get in the way. You all rock. 25 points to all who put money in the blender. You guys keep us running. 25 points a piece to Elliot and Dani for some awesome togas and drinking out of a Vietnamese vase. I mean, that's just impressive. -15 points to any wrestler that asked me a stupid question this weekend (is wrestling like marijuana? I swear these wrestlers seemd to have lost more brain cells than any stoner I have ever met). -20 points to any coach/wrestler that was more high maintenance this weekend than a girl on the OC. 60 points to Amanda Parsons-Twesten for helping me hold onto that thing I call sanity. You very much rock. 20 points to Lindsey for Twister, the ultimate party game. 45 points to Danielle for writing an awesome play and 25 points to anyone that was in it/helped out. That was a blast. I miss acting so much, so it was great to work with you all again. another 15 points to anyone that took time to see me over Thanksgiving break, I miss you all. 35 points to Danny for getting me rehooked on the Supertones. 30 points to Brad for some good late night talks. Much appreciated. And lastly, an additional 25 points to anyone who posts a quote inside joke of ours to make me laugh and 15 to anyone to use the word "pickle" creatively in a comment.
Well I think that is all for now. So I will leave you with some Supertones. Enjoy.
Here is a question,
Who are the pure?
What is the thing you're livin' for?
The world says to grow up 'cause nothin' is true,
What I believe is right for me,
And what you believe is right for you,
Some call it a new day,
I call it the ice age,
They belive in nothing,
We I believe in one thing.
They're afraid to be inspired,
All that we desire is fire,
Same old deception in a brand new disguise.
What's good and evil?
You decide,
God says who he is,
And no one is higher,
God is true while men are liars.
God dosn't change with your desires,
The they get defensive,
Truth is so offensive.
They believe in nothing,
We believe in onr thing.
Afraid to be inspired,
All that we desire is fire,
Fire is faith and passion,
Fire is tranformation,
So do you wanna cool it?
Fan the flame when it glows,
They're afraid to be inspired,
All that we desire is fire.
I haven't been to Fountain Square in a long time. Who is up for it? We wil get something together before Christmas break.
If there is one math I like best, I think its Discrete Mathematics (Disco). I wish I had taken that over Linear Algebra last year. Disco is like the math of common sense. I love it.
Wow, I am definately a nerd.
Ever start talking with someone from high school that you didn't talk with much when you were in high school with them and now you talk all the time making you wonder why the hell you didn't hang out more when you lived in the same city?
I need a good book for break. Any suggestions?
Apple-banana bread. Who would have thought. Kudos to Nick for making it. 25 points to you.
Hmmmm, its been a while since I've given out some points. So here we go. 50 points to Mike for becoming 21 and a blast this weekend. 40 points to Rabbi for saving your own ass by being too drunk (who woulda thought?). 30 points to all who came to the party last night. 35 points to Amy for a great phone call and nice talk last night. 50 points for anyone who came to our party from out of town. Those are true friends who don't let distance get in the way. You all rock. 25 points to all who put money in the blender. You guys keep us running. 25 points a piece to Elliot and Dani for some awesome togas and drinking out of a Vietnamese vase. I mean, that's just impressive. -15 points to any wrestler that asked me a stupid question this weekend (is wrestling like marijuana? I swear these wrestlers seemd to have lost more brain cells than any stoner I have ever met). -20 points to any coach/wrestler that was more high maintenance this weekend than a girl on the OC. 60 points to Amanda Parsons-Twesten for helping me hold onto that thing I call sanity. You very much rock. 20 points to Lindsey for Twister, the ultimate party game. 45 points to Danielle for writing an awesome play and 25 points to anyone that was in it/helped out. That was a blast. I miss acting so much, so it was great to work with you all again. another 15 points to anyone that took time to see me over Thanksgiving break, I miss you all. 35 points to Danny for getting me rehooked on the Supertones. 30 points to Brad for some good late night talks. Much appreciated. And lastly, an additional 25 points to anyone who posts a quote inside joke of ours to make me laugh and 15 to anyone to use the word "pickle" creatively in a comment.
Well I think that is all for now. So I will leave you with some Supertones. Enjoy.
Here is a question,
Who are the pure?
What is the thing you're livin' for?
The world says to grow up 'cause nothin' is true,
What I believe is right for me,
And what you believe is right for you,
Some call it a new day,
I call it the ice age,
They belive in nothing,
We I believe in one thing.
They're afraid to be inspired,
All that we desire is fire,
Same old deception in a brand new disguise.
What's good and evil?
You decide,
God says who he is,
And no one is higher,
God is true while men are liars.
God dosn't change with your desires,
The they get defensive,
Truth is so offensive.
They believe in nothing,
We believe in onr thing.
Afraid to be inspired,
All that we desire is fire,
Fire is faith and passion,
Fire is tranformation,
So do you wanna cool it?
Fan the flame when it glows,
They're afraid to be inspired,
All that we desire is fire.
Wednesday, November 30, 2005
In Between on a Wednesday Night
First of all, I'd like to apologize to my parents for going off about them before my facts were straight. I needed to vent and wanted to cool down before talking to them as when I did, I wnated to be clear headed so it could be a calm conversation and not just blow up and conversations with my parents have before. But I probably should not have made that vent public and for that I apologize.
Second of all, if you ahve something to say to me, something to criticize me for, something you want me to take remotely serious, back it up with a name or at least make sure you are right when you attack something like whether or not lyrics are correct or not. Anyone who plans to leave an anonymous comment, realize it won't be taken seriously at all.
Ever had a conversation with someone where you wonder if you are both speaking the same language? Ever have an argument with someone where you both are using the same logic to prove different points, causing you to wonder if its the same logic after all?
I went on a walk tonight and for the first time in a long time, it really didn't help. But it did make me wonder about something I hadn't really thought about, so I will take a poll: Do you think I am intense?
Been loving the OC Supertones lately. Such awesome music. I had forgotten about them. I just love rediscovering great bands.
"Why haven't you updated yet?" Because I almost feel like no one has read it. No one commented. Nothing I wrote affected you causing you to comment. See I hate updating before anyone has commented on the current post. Then I'm afraid no one will think to comment on that one. Maybe I'm weird, but if you want me to update more often, comment. It's kind of a positive feedback kind of thing. If I get a lot comments, I will update even more often, because then I feel like people care more.
Some people just intrigue me to no end. And I love it. I love getting to know someone and just seeing what makes them tick and why it does. I could sit down with a total stranger and probably enjoy just getting to know them. I may not want to be best friends afterwards, but I would enjoy the conversation. So if you want to talk or simply grab a nice cup of coffee, let me know, I'd love to pick your brain.
So I know I want to do something about it, but as to what, I am not sure. It seems like it could be so perfect, but I only totally understand it from my point of view. Something to ponder.
Ever hear someone sing/whistle the harmony to a song you can't hear? I swear thats just like female logic sometimes. I sure it would make sense and not just sound like a jumbled mess if I knew what was going on in your head.
Well not much more, so I will leave you with some awesome Supertones. And if you think the lyrics are wrong....bring it.
Please allow me to introduce me.
Half of me slave, the other half free.
Righteous and sinful,
both at the same time.
Iniquity and purity
fill up the same mind.
And out of the same mouth,
the holy and profane.
I curse all my brothers,
then I bless Christ's name.
I hang in the balance,
but still I'm secure.
I'm leaning towards evil,
but striving to be pure.
I stand between the saint and
sinner, chasing after holiness, close
enough to grasp, but still it's just
beyond my reach.
Who I am is in between,
what I wanna be and what I am.
Pulling from both sides,
humility and pride.
One seeks to give,
the other to be gratified.
In any case, however,
I know I'm in need.
Two appetites in me,
which one do I feed?
Running fast as I can
after elusive perfection.
No I'm not there yet,
but sure I'm in the right direction.
Cuz I see me at the end
and I look glorified.
Justified safe inside,
so I seek to be sanctified
Second of all, if you ahve something to say to me, something to criticize me for, something you want me to take remotely serious, back it up with a name or at least make sure you are right when you attack something like whether or not lyrics are correct or not. Anyone who plans to leave an anonymous comment, realize it won't be taken seriously at all.
Ever had a conversation with someone where you wonder if you are both speaking the same language? Ever have an argument with someone where you both are using the same logic to prove different points, causing you to wonder if its the same logic after all?
I went on a walk tonight and for the first time in a long time, it really didn't help. But it did make me wonder about something I hadn't really thought about, so I will take a poll: Do you think I am intense?
Been loving the OC Supertones lately. Such awesome music. I had forgotten about them. I just love rediscovering great bands.
"Why haven't you updated yet?" Because I almost feel like no one has read it. No one commented. Nothing I wrote affected you causing you to comment. See I hate updating before anyone has commented on the current post. Then I'm afraid no one will think to comment on that one. Maybe I'm weird, but if you want me to update more often, comment. It's kind of a positive feedback kind of thing. If I get a lot comments, I will update even more often, because then I feel like people care more.
Some people just intrigue me to no end. And I love it. I love getting to know someone and just seeing what makes them tick and why it does. I could sit down with a total stranger and probably enjoy just getting to know them. I may not want to be best friends afterwards, but I would enjoy the conversation. So if you want to talk or simply grab a nice cup of coffee, let me know, I'd love to pick your brain.
So I know I want to do something about it, but as to what, I am not sure. It seems like it could be so perfect, but I only totally understand it from my point of view. Something to ponder.
Ever hear someone sing/whistle the harmony to a song you can't hear? I swear thats just like female logic sometimes. I sure it would make sense and not just sound like a jumbled mess if I knew what was going on in your head.
Well not much more, so I will leave you with some awesome Supertones. And if you think the lyrics are wrong....bring it.
Please allow me to introduce me.
Half of me slave, the other half free.
Righteous and sinful,
both at the same time.
Iniquity and purity
fill up the same mind.
And out of the same mouth,
the holy and profane.
I curse all my brothers,
then I bless Christ's name.
I hang in the balance,
but still I'm secure.
I'm leaning towards evil,
but striving to be pure.
I stand between the saint and
sinner, chasing after holiness, close
enough to grasp, but still it's just
beyond my reach.
Who I am is in between,
what I wanna be and what I am.
Pulling from both sides,
humility and pride.
One seeks to give,
the other to be gratified.
In any case, however,
I know I'm in need.
Two appetites in me,
which one do I feed?
Running fast as I can
after elusive perfection.
No I'm not there yet,
but sure I'm in the right direction.
Cuz I see me at the end
and I look glorified.
Justified safe inside,
so I seek to be sanctified
Sunday, November 27, 2005
Little Man on a Sunday Night
There are no absolutes in life, except that driving around the holidas will make you crazy. On 70 from St. Louis to Terre Haute, I swear people must think that the lanes have changed and that you chill in the left lane and pass on the right. Where did these people learn to drive? I passed 25 cars on a stretch where I was the only car in the right lane as far as I could see, but these cars were lined up, one right after aother in the left, just chilling there, going about 65. People are so afriad to pass on the right. Now it shouldn't happen, but sometimes people are retarded and you have to. It should be illegal to get passed on the right. Or maybe have a three strike system. If you are ever passed on the right 3 times on a trip, you get a ticket. There is no reason you should ever get passed on the right if you are paying attention. If it happens every once in a while, I can see that, thats why you get three strikes. But if it happens more than that you are just being an asshat and should not have a license.
Ever get stuck behind a semi passing another semi for 10 minutes? Ever consider passing them on the shoulder because it's driving you that nuts? It's stuff like that that causes accidents. If I, a reasonably sensible person, will consider doing something as stupid as passing on the shoulder because of what something else would do (I don't actually do it, but it definately crosses my mind), what would your average driver do? A stupid driver (we all know there are plenty of those)?
Thanksgiving was pretty good. Got to see a few good friends from high school, which was very nice. I miss that group. It was fun to record the show for Danielle's project. I make a damn fine Edmund. :-P
He Who Must Not Be Named. That's what my neighbors have apparently started calling me. He Who Must Not Be Named. Because I am always in the doghouse at home and driving my parents nuts. Apparently. Or so my parents tell them. Apparently I am always driving them nuts. How does this make me feel? Wonderful, let me tell ya. Gotta love hearing that your parents bitch about you to the neighbors you are so close with, you consider them family. And not occasionally either, but all the time. Now doesn't that make you not want to wait to get home again?
Found out something else that has really sparked my interest. Not sure what to do about it yet though. I need to bounce some things off some good friends, so let me know if you'd like to catch a cup of coffee with me.
It was good to see my little brother, Danny again. He is surviving the Academy. And Leslie is surviving him being at the Academy. Those two are so amazingly cute, almost makes ya sick. Jimmy and Mo, too. I feel like such a loser around those two couples since I can't even make it past three months and they are on four and two years, respectively. And I get that look from my parents like, "Bob, you need to get going, you are the oldest and your brothers are showing you up." And so they try to set me up with Michelle as much as they can.
We have a tree now. Yup, that's right, we are festive. I think my parents love the fact that I have a house now. It gives them an excuse to get new stuff. Whatever, I don't mind.
Maybe I should get some sleep. Well I'll leave you with some classic O.C. Supertones. Enjoy.
Keep both my eyes transfixed on the prize
A high-rise to the blue skies my piece of the pie
There's a hole in my heart that I know how to fill
That's to light my cigarettes with a hundred dollar bill
It's all about cash flow the California dream
To make the grade you gotta make the green
My friend I'm the champion I've no time for losers
Never ask for nothin 'cause beggars can't be choosers
Lookin' our for number ones's a full time occupation
I'll give to me myself and I my own salvation
Some people try to tell me God can save me from my sin
But God can take a number and I'll pencil Him in
Busy oh so busy I got no time to search
My Sunday's are all booked I've got no time for church
That's for those poor souls, dry as a stone
God bless this child 'cause this child's got His own.
Oh, let my pride fall down I'm a little man
He who gets the most toys and dies is the winner
I'm livin' the high life with lobster tail dinners
My Lexus, my yacht, my gold chains and rings
These are a few of my favorite things
But most of all I keep my billfold the closest to my heart
House decorated with million dollar works of art
Roll with the Bigwigs they think I'm the man
But then I stop and look and think about how big I really am
Mammon is an unforgiving God, I cast him away
I live my life to God, not to get paid
Money can't save your soul, don't think I can
I look to God and I feel like a little man.
Ever get stuck behind a semi passing another semi for 10 minutes? Ever consider passing them on the shoulder because it's driving you that nuts? It's stuff like that that causes accidents. If I, a reasonably sensible person, will consider doing something as stupid as passing on the shoulder because of what something else would do (I don't actually do it, but it definately crosses my mind), what would your average driver do? A stupid driver (we all know there are plenty of those)?
Thanksgiving was pretty good. Got to see a few good friends from high school, which was very nice. I miss that group. It was fun to record the show for Danielle's project. I make a damn fine Edmund. :-P
He Who Must Not Be Named. That's what my neighbors have apparently started calling me. He Who Must Not Be Named. Because I am always in the doghouse at home and driving my parents nuts. Apparently. Or so my parents tell them. Apparently I am always driving them nuts. How does this make me feel? Wonderful, let me tell ya. Gotta love hearing that your parents bitch about you to the neighbors you are so close with, you consider them family. And not occasionally either, but all the time. Now doesn't that make you not want to wait to get home again?
Found out something else that has really sparked my interest. Not sure what to do about it yet though. I need to bounce some things off some good friends, so let me know if you'd like to catch a cup of coffee with me.
It was good to see my little brother, Danny again. He is surviving the Academy. And Leslie is surviving him being at the Academy. Those two are so amazingly cute, almost makes ya sick. Jimmy and Mo, too. I feel like such a loser around those two couples since I can't even make it past three months and they are on four and two years, respectively. And I get that look from my parents like, "Bob, you need to get going, you are the oldest and your brothers are showing you up." And so they try to set me up with Michelle as much as they can.
We have a tree now. Yup, that's right, we are festive. I think my parents love the fact that I have a house now. It gives them an excuse to get new stuff. Whatever, I don't mind.
Maybe I should get some sleep. Well I'll leave you with some classic O.C. Supertones. Enjoy.
Keep both my eyes transfixed on the prize
A high-rise to the blue skies my piece of the pie
There's a hole in my heart that I know how to fill
That's to light my cigarettes with a hundred dollar bill
It's all about cash flow the California dream
To make the grade you gotta make the green
My friend I'm the champion I've no time for losers
Never ask for nothin 'cause beggars can't be choosers
Lookin' our for number ones's a full time occupation
I'll give to me myself and I my own salvation
Some people try to tell me God can save me from my sin
But God can take a number and I'll pencil Him in
Busy oh so busy I got no time to search
My Sunday's are all booked I've got no time for church
That's for those poor souls, dry as a stone
God bless this child 'cause this child's got His own.
Oh, let my pride fall down I'm a little man
He who gets the most toys and dies is the winner
I'm livin' the high life with lobster tail dinners
My Lexus, my yacht, my gold chains and rings
These are a few of my favorite things
But most of all I keep my billfold the closest to my heart
House decorated with million dollar works of art
Roll with the Bigwigs they think I'm the man
But then I stop and look and think about how big I really am
Mammon is an unforgiving God, I cast him away
I live my life to God, not to get paid
Money can't save your soul, don't think I can
I look to God and I feel like a little man.
Wednesday, November 23, 2005
Give Me a Call on a Tuesday Night
So Mahoney is now 21. Congratulations, man. You made it another year. How does it feel?
At BW3's tonight, I began to appreciate being from Illinois a little bit more as Mahoney was turned down for a drink on his 21st birthday. See in Indiana, your driver's license expires on your 21st birthday, so you must renew it on that day. If you renew beforehand, it's only a probationary license, and if you renew after it expires, they charge you a late fee. So you get a one day window. How retarded is that?
Nick says some of the weirdest things in his sleep, rivaling even Adam.
You know what really gets my goose? People canceling on me last minute. I just don't get this at all. For me, when I give my word on something, I'm in. Period. Unless something major happens, like breaking my toe causing me not to be able to drive, I'll be there. You can count on me.
I also don't get why it is so hard for some people who are pretty close to come see me. And I'm tired of hearing excuses. If you want it to happen, you will find a way. So you don't have a car, I'm sure you can find someone who would be wiling to up and go visit a friend with you. This is college. So you've been busy. I understand that, but I guarentee you aren't always busy. I guess I just know where I stand with some people.
Disclaimer: Neither of the above paragraphs are directed at anyone in particular or even necessarily to current events, so don't read into it.
Wanting something you can't have can drive a man crazy.
Ever feel like some people take your generosity for granted? Like they know you are a pretty generous person and so it is now just expected? Sure, I probably would say yes, but maybe I'd still like you to ask and not just assume, as well as a simple thank you goes a long way, even if it isn't out of the ordinary. Maybe I shouldn't be generous all the time any more. Maybe just bring it out for special occasions. Then would it be more appreciated?
Well, that's all for now. I'll leave you with some 311. Cheers.
Ooh you draw such pictures in my head
Ooh with so few words I know what you said
Until the time comes
To carry the one
Make that dream real
And be sure it stays done
So let that thought
Bloom in your mind
A vision that's caught
Never left behind
You should just give me a call
You should just give me a call
I think about you much more than I should
Now there's a structure nothing had once stood
No more bluffing it's cards on the table time
What it must be we will take it as a sign
So just give me a call
So just give me a call
Sunset and my love left me
winter and I'm so far
In darkness will it lead me
where the meanings are
I miss and think of you often
no flowers I forgot them
the weather's the same
nothing happens
no love's a hard lesson
patience and years will refashion
what hours will undo
and circles not yet quite circles
somehow close true
I keep on hearing the things that you said
I keep on feeling you go straight to my head
No more bluffing it's cards on the table time
What it must be we will take it as a sign
So just give me a call
So just give me a call
I call you up but you won't talk to me
No space for words there's just no room
I drift away but you pull me in
I'm the ocean youre the moon
Ooh how do I know if it's just me
Sometimes I think that it must be
You gotta know you can trust me
At BW3's tonight, I began to appreciate being from Illinois a little bit more as Mahoney was turned down for a drink on his 21st birthday. See in Indiana, your driver's license expires on your 21st birthday, so you must renew it on that day. If you renew beforehand, it's only a probationary license, and if you renew after it expires, they charge you a late fee. So you get a one day window. How retarded is that?
Nick says some of the weirdest things in his sleep, rivaling even Adam.
You know what really gets my goose? People canceling on me last minute. I just don't get this at all. For me, when I give my word on something, I'm in. Period. Unless something major happens, like breaking my toe causing me not to be able to drive, I'll be there. You can count on me.
I also don't get why it is so hard for some people who are pretty close to come see me. And I'm tired of hearing excuses. If you want it to happen, you will find a way. So you don't have a car, I'm sure you can find someone who would be wiling to up and go visit a friend with you. This is college. So you've been busy. I understand that, but I guarentee you aren't always busy. I guess I just know where I stand with some people.
Disclaimer: Neither of the above paragraphs are directed at anyone in particular or even necessarily to current events, so don't read into it.
Wanting something you can't have can drive a man crazy.
Ever feel like some people take your generosity for granted? Like they know you are a pretty generous person and so it is now just expected? Sure, I probably would say yes, but maybe I'd still like you to ask and not just assume, as well as a simple thank you goes a long way, even if it isn't out of the ordinary. Maybe I shouldn't be generous all the time any more. Maybe just bring it out for special occasions. Then would it be more appreciated?
Well, that's all for now. I'll leave you with some 311. Cheers.
Ooh you draw such pictures in my head
Ooh with so few words I know what you said
Until the time comes
To carry the one
Make that dream real
And be sure it stays done
So let that thought
Bloom in your mind
A vision that's caught
Never left behind
You should just give me a call
You should just give me a call
I think about you much more than I should
Now there's a structure nothing had once stood
No more bluffing it's cards on the table time
What it must be we will take it as a sign
So just give me a call
So just give me a call
Sunset and my love left me
winter and I'm so far
In darkness will it lead me
where the meanings are
I miss and think of you often
no flowers I forgot them
the weather's the same
nothing happens
no love's a hard lesson
patience and years will refashion
what hours will undo
and circles not yet quite circles
somehow close true
I keep on hearing the things that you said
I keep on feeling you go straight to my head
No more bluffing it's cards on the table time
What it must be we will take it as a sign
So just give me a call
So just give me a call
I call you up but you won't talk to me
No space for words there's just no room
I drift away but you pull me in
I'm the ocean youre the moon
Ooh how do I know if it's just me
Sometimes I think that it must be
You gotta know you can trust me
Tuesday, November 15, 2005
Smell the Color Nine on a Tuesday Night
Watched Donnie Darko tonight. Excellent movie. Really makes you think. I love movies like that. It is so well done too. Really makes you think about the mysteries of time travel or seeing into the future. Love it.
Got to hear from my good friend Michelle last night, and I must say it was wonderful to sit down and just talk with her again. I really miss that. I used to be really close to some people from high school and I miss that connection that we had. Maybe I can get it back, or maybe it will never be the same. We'll just have to see.
So take a chance and make it big,
Cause it's the last you'll ever get.
If we don't take it, when will we make it?
A hundred points to the first to name that band and song.
I watch friends all around me getting maried and it makes me wonder why I can't even date a girl longer than three months? What am I doing wrong here? Why has dating become so hard? Why has it become so hard to simply get to know some people sometimes so you can even make the decision of whether or not you woud like to step int something with them? Since when did that word date become a huge turnoff? I see girls that fit the requirements I have made, but none of them seem to be interested in me. Am I aiming too high? Do I have too high of standards?
Ever feel like you are sitting still as life flies by you? Sometimes I feel like in the game of life I am still the backup quarterback. I practice hard, I take tough hits from our starting defense since they can't hit the starting quarterback and then come gametime, I stand on the sidelines with the clip board wathing the game unfold. What's worse than watching a game from the sidelines? Watching your team lose from the sidelines. To see a loss to your team when you aren't even given the chance to help out. You want to be out there, especially if your team is losing.
Well looks like I'll be able to come home this weekend. Not much is going on around here as Rose is on break and I could use a nice weekend at home. Not to mention Michelle needs a date for the fall play and that sounds like it would be an awesome time. How can ya pass that up? I mean, for Christ's sake!
Well??
Hehe, gotta love BNL. If you didn't get the above, then you need to listen to their live CD that Adam has.
I am really looking forward to a nice weekend at home. Amy will be home as well, which it will be nice to see her again. It's been a while. If you will be home this weekend and want to get together, let me know. We'll work something out.
Well I think I will leave you with some awesome Chris Rice. Such a talented musician and writer. This song intrigued me since the first moment I heard the title. I love the words. And I think sometimes tying to understand women is like trying to smell the color nine.
I would take no for an answer,
Just to know I heard you speak,
And I'm wondering why I've never,
Seen the signs they claim they see,
A lotta special revelations,
Meant for everybody but me,
Maybe I don't truly know You,
or maybe I just simply believe...
Cause I can sniff, I can see, and I can
count up pretty high; but these faculties
aren't getting me any closer to the sky,
but my heart of faith keeps poundin' so
I know I'm doin' fine but sometimes findin
you is just like tryin to smell the color nine.
Smell the color nine...
Now I've never felt the presence,
But I know You're always near,
And I've never heard the calling,
But somehow You've led me right here,
So I'm not lookin' for burnin' bushes,
Or some Divine graffiti to appear,
I'm just beggin You for Your wisdom,
And I believe You're puttin' some here...
Nine's not a color...
and if even if it were you can't smell a color,
no that's my point exactly.
Got to hear from my good friend Michelle last night, and I must say it was wonderful to sit down and just talk with her again. I really miss that. I used to be really close to some people from high school and I miss that connection that we had. Maybe I can get it back, or maybe it will never be the same. We'll just have to see.
So take a chance and make it big,
Cause it's the last you'll ever get.
If we don't take it, when will we make it?
A hundred points to the first to name that band and song.
I watch friends all around me getting maried and it makes me wonder why I can't even date a girl longer than three months? What am I doing wrong here? Why has dating become so hard? Why has it become so hard to simply get to know some people sometimes so you can even make the decision of whether or not you woud like to step int something with them? Since when did that word date become a huge turnoff? I see girls that fit the requirements I have made, but none of them seem to be interested in me. Am I aiming too high? Do I have too high of standards?
Ever feel like you are sitting still as life flies by you? Sometimes I feel like in the game of life I am still the backup quarterback. I practice hard, I take tough hits from our starting defense since they can't hit the starting quarterback and then come gametime, I stand on the sidelines with the clip board wathing the game unfold. What's worse than watching a game from the sidelines? Watching your team lose from the sidelines. To see a loss to your team when you aren't even given the chance to help out. You want to be out there, especially if your team is losing.
Well looks like I'll be able to come home this weekend. Not much is going on around here as Rose is on break and I could use a nice weekend at home. Not to mention Michelle needs a date for the fall play and that sounds like it would be an awesome time. How can ya pass that up? I mean, for Christ's sake!
Well??
Hehe, gotta love BNL. If you didn't get the above, then you need to listen to their live CD that Adam has.
I am really looking forward to a nice weekend at home. Amy will be home as well, which it will be nice to see her again. It's been a while. If you will be home this weekend and want to get together, let me know. We'll work something out.
Well I think I will leave you with some awesome Chris Rice. Such a talented musician and writer. This song intrigued me since the first moment I heard the title. I love the words. And I think sometimes tying to understand women is like trying to smell the color nine.
I would take no for an answer,
Just to know I heard you speak,
And I'm wondering why I've never,
Seen the signs they claim they see,
A lotta special revelations,
Meant for everybody but me,
Maybe I don't truly know You,
or maybe I just simply believe...
Cause I can sniff, I can see, and I can
count up pretty high; but these faculties
aren't getting me any closer to the sky,
but my heart of faith keeps poundin' so
I know I'm doin' fine but sometimes findin
you is just like tryin to smell the color nine.
Smell the color nine...
Now I've never felt the presence,
But I know You're always near,
And I've never heard the calling,
But somehow You've led me right here,
So I'm not lookin' for burnin' bushes,
Or some Divine graffiti to appear,
I'm just beggin You for Your wisdom,
And I believe You're puttin' some here...
Nine's not a color...
and if even if it were you can't smell a color,
no that's my point exactly.
Saturday, November 12, 2005
Somewhere I Belong on a Friday Night
I needed tonight. It was refreshingly relaxing. I didn't really do much at all and it was everything I was hoping it would be. After a most tasty dinner at Real Hacienda, we came back to the house. I ran to take a shower real quick so I could run to Ballroom Dancing Club, but as I stepped into the shower and felt that hot water massaging, beating on my skin, I decided I didn't want to run about tonight. I didn't want to push for a 2 minute shower, but relax and just enjoy a nice, hot shower. Then I got out and tooled for a little bit and played a video game a little. We played a little poker, for no money mind you (which gets a little annoying, but I'll come back to that) then I just curled up on the couch and just read for a while, enjoying a nice beverage. It was wonderful. I just sat there for a couple hours, diving into a nice book without a care. Then Justin calls me up and informs me we are heading to IHOP. So I got to a stopping point and went over to my computer to check some stuff to find that an old friend has added me to her MSN list. So I chatted with her for a little. It was really nice. I haven't spoken to her in ages, but had wondered what had happened to her. So it's always nice to catchup a little.
All in all, a good night. I'm in a good mood, can ya tell?
In a Linkin Park mood right now. Which is kind of odd. Linkin Park tends to be kinda angry, but I'm not angry at all. Maybe it's more becuase it makes it feel like freshman year. Who knows?
It's been a crazy week ranging from absolute bliss when the Pats got destroyed, and I mean destroyed, by the Colts to wanting to jump off a cliff. But things are back to a simple smile.
You know what I love? I love that simple late night cup of coffee with someone fun. Just go somewhere and talk. I love big group stuff, don't get me wrong, but I mis just doing something with one person. To simply dive into getting to know them better. A deep conversation or a simple late reminiscence of previous happenings. I love it. Especially with those I don't know that well. So for those of you out there I don't knwo as well as I would like, which pretty much includes everyone who reads my blog, let me know, I'd love to sit down and talk.
Well, it is getting late so I think I'll leave ya with some Linkin Park. Enjoy.
(When this began)
I had nothing to say
And I get lost in the nothingness inside of me
(I was confused)
And I let it all out to find
That I’m not the only person with these things in mind
(Inside of me)
But all the vacancy the words revealed
Is the only real thing that I’ve got left to feel
(Nothing to lose)
Just stuck/ hollow and alone
And the fault is my own, and the fault is my own
I wanna heal, I wanna feel what I thought was never real
I wanna let go of the pain I’ve held so long
(Erase all the pain till it’s gone)
I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I’m close to something real
I wanna find something I’ve wanted all along
Somewhere I belong
And I’ve got nothing to say
I can’t believe I didn’t fall right down on my face
(I was confused)
Looking everywhere only to find
That it’s not the way I had imagined it all in my mind
(So what am I)
What do I have but negativity
’Cause I can’t justify the way, everyone is looking at me
(Nothing to lose)
Nothing to gain/ hollow and alone
And the fault is my own, and the fault is my own
I will never know myself until I do this on my own
And I will never feel anything else, until my wounds are healed
I will never be anything till I break away from me
I will break away, I'll find myself today
I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I’m somewhere I belong
I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I’m somewhere I belong
Somewhere I belong
All in all, a good night. I'm in a good mood, can ya tell?
In a Linkin Park mood right now. Which is kind of odd. Linkin Park tends to be kinda angry, but I'm not angry at all. Maybe it's more becuase it makes it feel like freshman year. Who knows?
It's been a crazy week ranging from absolute bliss when the Pats got destroyed, and I mean destroyed, by the Colts to wanting to jump off a cliff. But things are back to a simple smile.
You know what I love? I love that simple late night cup of coffee with someone fun. Just go somewhere and talk. I love big group stuff, don't get me wrong, but I mis just doing something with one person. To simply dive into getting to know them better. A deep conversation or a simple late reminiscence of previous happenings. I love it. Especially with those I don't know that well. So for those of you out there I don't knwo as well as I would like, which pretty much includes everyone who reads my blog, let me know, I'd love to sit down and talk.
Well, it is getting late so I think I'll leave ya with some Linkin Park. Enjoy.
(When this began)
I had nothing to say
And I get lost in the nothingness inside of me
(I was confused)
And I let it all out to find
That I’m not the only person with these things in mind
(Inside of me)
But all the vacancy the words revealed
Is the only real thing that I’ve got left to feel
(Nothing to lose)
Just stuck/ hollow and alone
And the fault is my own, and the fault is my own
I wanna heal, I wanna feel what I thought was never real
I wanna let go of the pain I’ve held so long
(Erase all the pain till it’s gone)
I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I’m close to something real
I wanna find something I’ve wanted all along
Somewhere I belong
And I’ve got nothing to say
I can’t believe I didn’t fall right down on my face
(I was confused)
Looking everywhere only to find
That it’s not the way I had imagined it all in my mind
(So what am I)
What do I have but negativity
’Cause I can’t justify the way, everyone is looking at me
(Nothing to lose)
Nothing to gain/ hollow and alone
And the fault is my own, and the fault is my own
I will never know myself until I do this on my own
And I will never feel anything else, until my wounds are healed
I will never be anything till I break away from me
I will break away, I'll find myself today
I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I’m somewhere I belong
I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I’m somewhere I belong
Somewhere I belong
Wednesday, November 09, 2005
So that I may understand the complex infrastructure known as the female mind...
[EDIT]
Ok, so I think people got the wrong impression of that post. I am a writer. I love creative writing. And this was a time that I simply sat down and just wrote. Not a big novel like I have been working on, but a short story. a simple half hour of my life that I hoped to write and hope that you would feel the emotions of the narrator. I guess in a way, that worked, but feeling sorry for me was not the emotion I was going for really. For one, this wasn't a total defeat. At least I think. Who knows, but I doubt it was. I wasn't looking for advice, although thank you to all who were willing to give it. I was simply doing some creative writing, but I guess that wasn't quite made well known. So I have moved it to my Creative Writing Site. This I am sure is a better fit. Thanks for your comments, and check out my awesome stories on the site if you liked the previous post.
Ok, so I think people got the wrong impression of that post. I am a writer. I love creative writing. And this was a time that I simply sat down and just wrote. Not a big novel like I have been working on, but a short story. a simple half hour of my life that I hoped to write and hope that you would feel the emotions of the narrator. I guess in a way, that worked, but feeling sorry for me was not the emotion I was going for really. For one, this wasn't a total defeat. At least I think. Who knows, but I doubt it was. I wasn't looking for advice, although thank you to all who were willing to give it. I was simply doing some creative writing, but I guess that wasn't quite made well known. So I have moved it to my Creative Writing Site. This I am sure is a better fit. Thanks for your comments, and check out my awesome stories on the site if you liked the previous post.
Sunday, November 06, 2005
Loss For Words on a Sunday Night
Hehe, the irony of that title.
After looking for hours upon hours I found my lost CD. And I am in a good mood. A very good mood. =)
Gage is here this weekend. It has been a very good weekend. I rather enjoyed it. All of it. I don't remember the last time that has happened. I think the last time that happened was when I took Katie home with me, and we went to a Cardinals game and played golf. That was a fun weekend. Well this one was up there, but for different reasons.
Friday we went to see Jarhead. Awesome movie. It made me remember all that I loved about the military and really made me strongly consider OTS after graduating. Such a great and honorable profession. Maybe it is what I was meant to do, maybe not. We'll see. But as far as movies go, Jarhead was an excellent film and I would highly recomend it. If you are around the Haute and are looking for someone to go with ya, let me know. I'd see it again.
Every storm deserves an ending
And a break to peaceful skies
And every night I pray for my own mending
So another hundred points to anyone to tell me the name of the band and song this is from. I will give you a hint, it is the same band and the previous post. Hell, another, I wish I had the lea singer's range. Such an excellent singer.
I got to talk to an old friend from high school. It was really nice to talk to this person again. She made me smile and a nice smile is always appreciated. 34 points to you.
Gage cooked dinner tonight, and did a damn fine job I may add. Check out the recipe and you can almost imagine what it tastes like. Only it even tastes better. I even enjoyed the mushrooms in it. And for those who know me, that says something. I think I am gonna have to cook it at home somtime. Mmmmmmmmm.
Ever be rather interested in someone, only for them to choose a complete douche hat over you? I have. A couple times even. And there is nothing you can do. You are their friend, but anything you say to them about how much of an ass clown this person is so they don't get hurt, there is that wonder of motivation. Gahhhhhh. Not to mention what a slap in the face it is to know that this jerk was chosen over you. That to this person, you are lower than one of the biggest asses you know. Wow, what a humbling expereince. And then they have issues in the relationship about how much he's a jerk and she comes to you, the friend. And as a friend you want to give her honest advice, but you can't. Because if you were honest with her, she would think you are simply trying to break them up so you can date her. So you must say something to calm her fears and help her work the rlationship out, even if you don't think the relationship is a good idea because you don't want to be the one to say that she should ditch the bastard. Grrrrrrrrr.
Ever listen to old music and have it remind you of something very specific because you played it often when doing something. I get that a lot. Most of my music can remind me of something specific, having nothing to do with the song itself but what i was doing when listeing to it. Linkin Park often reminds me of freshman year as I wore that band out that year. Switchfoot reminds me of Caroline. 311, Katie. The new Tait and Toby CDs, the winter I spent at home--each one reminding me of a different job I held while home, Toby-the job in the radiology dept of St E's hospital, Tait-the warehouse job for the Shrine. It's kind of interesting actually.
I enjoy having Gage here. I'm glad he will be here full time again soon.
I have received many compliments on my covers and I thank you all very much. It's nice to see the work that you put into something go appreciated, and I appreciate your support.
Ever get mad or irritated at someone for not dropping everything when you need them, even though you know that's way too much to demand of someone. You feel like a jerk for being aggrivated, but you would drop everything for this person. But still, you have no reason to be mad. Maybe I'm just dumb. Inner-conflict. Grrrrrrrr.
I love late night talks with certain people. There is nothing like it.
Well, it's late, I should go to bed. So I will leave you with some Tait. Thank God for finding that CD. Love it.
I’m at a loss,
I’m at a loss for words, I really want to say
I’m finding for myself
What can I do
When every road I travel leads me back to you
Instead of somewhere else
I apologize
Cause what I wanted to say
Never came out the way
I wanted it to, I wanted it to
Cause what I wanted to say
Only got in the way
I never meant to hurt you
But I didn’t have a clue
I’m just a man
I’m just a man in need of something better than
I’m finding for myself
You count the cost
For everything you gain there’s always something lost
You’re worth so much more
Listen to my heart whispering
I need you
Empty words cannot suffice
I’ve been runnin’ from what I know is right
When only Yours are words of life
Every time you come around
Every time I make a sound
After looking for hours upon hours I found my lost CD. And I am in a good mood. A very good mood. =)
Gage is here this weekend. It has been a very good weekend. I rather enjoyed it. All of it. I don't remember the last time that has happened. I think the last time that happened was when I took Katie home with me, and we went to a Cardinals game and played golf. That was a fun weekend. Well this one was up there, but for different reasons.
Friday we went to see Jarhead. Awesome movie. It made me remember all that I loved about the military and really made me strongly consider OTS after graduating. Such a great and honorable profession. Maybe it is what I was meant to do, maybe not. We'll see. But as far as movies go, Jarhead was an excellent film and I would highly recomend it. If you are around the Haute and are looking for someone to go with ya, let me know. I'd see it again.
Every storm deserves an ending
And a break to peaceful skies
And every night I pray for my own mending
So another hundred points to anyone to tell me the name of the band and song this is from. I will give you a hint, it is the same band and the previous post. Hell, another, I wish I had the lea singer's range. Such an excellent singer.
I got to talk to an old friend from high school. It was really nice to talk to this person again. She made me smile and a nice smile is always appreciated. 34 points to you.
Gage cooked dinner tonight, and did a damn fine job I may add. Check out the recipe and you can almost imagine what it tastes like. Only it even tastes better. I even enjoyed the mushrooms in it. And for those who know me, that says something. I think I am gonna have to cook it at home somtime. Mmmmmmmmm.
Ever be rather interested in someone, only for them to choose a complete douche hat over you? I have. A couple times even. And there is nothing you can do. You are their friend, but anything you say to them about how much of an ass clown this person is so they don't get hurt, there is that wonder of motivation. Gahhhhhh. Not to mention what a slap in the face it is to know that this jerk was chosen over you. That to this person, you are lower than one of the biggest asses you know. Wow, what a humbling expereince. And then they have issues in the relationship about how much he's a jerk and she comes to you, the friend. And as a friend you want to give her honest advice, but you can't. Because if you were honest with her, she would think you are simply trying to break them up so you can date her. So you must say something to calm her fears and help her work the rlationship out, even if you don't think the relationship is a good idea because you don't want to be the one to say that she should ditch the bastard. Grrrrrrrrr.
Ever listen to old music and have it remind you of something very specific because you played it often when doing something. I get that a lot. Most of my music can remind me of something specific, having nothing to do with the song itself but what i was doing when listeing to it. Linkin Park often reminds me of freshman year as I wore that band out that year. Switchfoot reminds me of Caroline. 311, Katie. The new Tait and Toby CDs, the winter I spent at home--each one reminding me of a different job I held while home, Toby-the job in the radiology dept of St E's hospital, Tait-the warehouse job for the Shrine. It's kind of interesting actually.
I enjoy having Gage here. I'm glad he will be here full time again soon.
I have received many compliments on my covers and I thank you all very much. It's nice to see the work that you put into something go appreciated, and I appreciate your support.
Ever get mad or irritated at someone for not dropping everything when you need them, even though you know that's way too much to demand of someone. You feel like a jerk for being aggrivated, but you would drop everything for this person. But still, you have no reason to be mad. Maybe I'm just dumb. Inner-conflict. Grrrrrrrr.
I love late night talks with certain people. There is nothing like it.
Well, it's late, I should go to bed. So I will leave you with some Tait. Thank God for finding that CD. Love it.
I’m at a loss,
I’m at a loss for words, I really want to say
I’m finding for myself
What can I do
When every road I travel leads me back to you
Instead of somewhere else
I apologize
Cause what I wanted to say
Never came out the way
I wanted it to, I wanted it to
Cause what I wanted to say
Only got in the way
I never meant to hurt you
But I didn’t have a clue
I’m just a man
I’m just a man in need of something better than
I’m finding for myself
You count the cost
For everything you gain there’s always something lost
You’re worth so much more
Listen to my heart whispering
I need you
Empty words cannot suffice
I’ve been runnin’ from what I know is right
When only Yours are words of life
Every time you come around
Every time I make a sound
Friday, November 04, 2005
Summertime on a Friday Night
So I haven't updated in a long while. Well aparently I am scaring some people with my blog or they think I am horribly depressed. We for one, I am not depressed, but I find it rather soothing that when I'm not in a good modd to write these thoughts in my blog. And second of all, when I'm in a great mood, I rarely want to just sit here at my computer for the length to write a post.
As for the reason for my posting drought, I have been crazy busy with work and such. But I have some awesome covers to show for my efforts. The men's basketball guide took me 12 hours to develop and the women's guide 8. Here are the covers I have done. Click on them for the full version.
If you want to see more of the covers I have created go here. Most of them should be there and will be there by this time next week.
The sun is rising in her eyes
Hold on, the day will come
Love is waiting
Running to the light
Hold on, the day will come
100 points to the first to leave the Artist and Song. 50 points a piece from last post to Heather and Jen. One named the artist, the other the name. Good job girls. Being able to name it, gives more respect for you.
We are going to see Jarhead tonight. I'm looking forward to that movie. It looks mighty good.
Ever spend time with someone you used to want to date and be reminded of the things you used to love about her, but then be reminded why you are no longer interested. Such conflict.
Nick has the full version of Trackmania. Muy excited. The muy seemed appropriate given it's Nick's game.
Ahhh, a new month. October is done. October sucked to last the year. November just feels so brand new. Nothing like a nice restart. I think life needs a Ctl-Alt-Del.
I've been rather enjoying Mae, so I think I will leave with some. Enjoy.
Summertime, summertime brought me back to thinking you were mine all those times.
We laid it down and left it all behind, we were blind.
Oh, the summertime.
We could ride, we could ride.
Take my hand and watch the world go by.
Laugh or cry, well we need to try, get off the line, time to fly.
Oh, the summertime.
Go on ahead and let it fade away.
No looking back you know the past will stay.
It's you and me, we could get out of here.
Jump in and go and we could drive for years.
We could feel alive...
Here we are, here we are,
windows down we see a falling star.
Stop the car.
Waiting for nothing but our beating hearts, going far.
Oh, the summertime.
So feel the air, feel the air,
take the map and point to anywhere.
I don't care. Fingers through your hair,
the sky I've seen is blue and green.
Oh, the summertime.
Driving away, leaving it all behind.
Driving away, just driving away.
As for the reason for my posting drought, I have been crazy busy with work and such. But I have some awesome covers to show for my efforts. The men's basketball guide took me 12 hours to develop and the women's guide 8. Here are the covers I have done. Click on them for the full version.
If you want to see more of the covers I have created go here. Most of them should be there and will be there by this time next week.
The sun is rising in her eyes
Hold on, the day will come
Love is waiting
Running to the light
Hold on, the day will come
100 points to the first to leave the Artist and Song. 50 points a piece from last post to Heather and Jen. One named the artist, the other the name. Good job girls. Being able to name it, gives more respect for you.
We are going to see Jarhead tonight. I'm looking forward to that movie. It looks mighty good.
Ever spend time with someone you used to want to date and be reminded of the things you used to love about her, but then be reminded why you are no longer interested. Such conflict.
Nick has the full version of Trackmania. Muy excited. The muy seemed appropriate given it's Nick's game.
Ahhh, a new month. October is done. October sucked to last the year. November just feels so brand new. Nothing like a nice restart. I think life needs a Ctl-Alt-Del.
I've been rather enjoying Mae, so I think I will leave with some. Enjoy.
Summertime, summertime brought me back to thinking you were mine all those times.
We laid it down and left it all behind, we were blind.
Oh, the summertime.
We could ride, we could ride.
Take my hand and watch the world go by.
Laugh or cry, well we need to try, get off the line, time to fly.
Oh, the summertime.
Go on ahead and let it fade away.
No looking back you know the past will stay.
It's you and me, we could get out of here.
Jump in and go and we could drive for years.
We could feel alive...
Here we are, here we are,
windows down we see a falling star.
Stop the car.
Waiting for nothing but our beating hearts, going far.
Oh, the summertime.
So feel the air, feel the air,
take the map and point to anywhere.
I don't care. Fingers through your hair,
the sky I've seen is blue and green.
Oh, the summertime.
Driving away, leaving it all behind.
Driving away, just driving away.
Thursday, October 27, 2005
Falling Out on a Thursday Night
I'm tired of pretending. I'm tired of not listening to really awesome songs because my friends give me a weird look. I'm tired of being meh. I'm tired of drama. I'm tired of not enjoying my Tuesdays. I'm tired of not being happy most of the time like I used to. I'm tired of losing, all the time. And overall, I'm just tired.
the fear of never falling in love
and the tears after losing the feelings
of what you thought love was
100 points if you can name the song and band. I'll give you a hint, we listened to it on the way back from Steak 'n Shake.
I think I need to move to Washington. Apparently I more attractive there.
Thanksgiving cannot come soon enough. I am actually excited to go back home. I really miss it right now. Home will be a great relief.
Well I think I am just gonna go to bed and wake up early and start my day off right. A way I haven't started my day in so long. A way I've been missing. Here's to getting that back.
And here is some Relient K that just fits my mood most perfectly. Peace.
i'm falling out of grace with the world
they say i've lost my midas touch what turned to gold now turns to rust
i'm falling out of line with all the stars
that flood my dreams with their guitars and magazines
face down this carpet tastes like coffee grounds ground into my face now
and every angle's covered with just another
i'm falling out of style with the current way things are
the things that make conforming hard
i'm falling out of control and you just can't stop me now
i'll fight as long as time allows
face down this carpet tastes like coffee grounds ground into my face now
and every angle's covered with just another band-aid
i'm out here way beyond
a shadow of a doubt
and i know i'm never falling out
of favor with you
i'm out here way beyond
a shadow of a doubt
and i know i'm never falling out
of favor with you
i won't think twice or even three times
about taking a gamble with you
cause with my life you have been so kind
i take all my comfort from you
face down this carpet tastes like coffee grounds ground into my face now
and every angle's covered with just another band-aid
i'm out here way beyond
a shadow of a doubt
and i know i'm never falling out
of favor with you
i'm out here way beyond
a shadow of a doubt
and i know i'm never falling out
of favor with you
the fear of never falling in love
and the tears after losing the feelings
of what you thought love was
100 points if you can name the song and band. I'll give you a hint, we listened to it on the way back from Steak 'n Shake.
I think I need to move to Washington. Apparently I more attractive there.
Thanksgiving cannot come soon enough. I am actually excited to go back home. I really miss it right now. Home will be a great relief.
Well I think I am just gonna go to bed and wake up early and start my day off right. A way I haven't started my day in so long. A way I've been missing. Here's to getting that back.
And here is some Relient K that just fits my mood most perfectly. Peace.
i'm falling out of grace with the world
they say i've lost my midas touch what turned to gold now turns to rust
i'm falling out of line with all the stars
that flood my dreams with their guitars and magazines
face down this carpet tastes like coffee grounds ground into my face now
and every angle's covered with just another
i'm falling out of style with the current way things are
the things that make conforming hard
i'm falling out of control and you just can't stop me now
i'll fight as long as time allows
face down this carpet tastes like coffee grounds ground into my face now
and every angle's covered with just another band-aid
i'm out here way beyond
a shadow of a doubt
and i know i'm never falling out
of favor with you
i'm out here way beyond
a shadow of a doubt
and i know i'm never falling out
of favor with you
i won't think twice or even three times
about taking a gamble with you
cause with my life you have been so kind
i take all my comfort from you
face down this carpet tastes like coffee grounds ground into my face now
and every angle's covered with just another band-aid
i'm out here way beyond
a shadow of a doubt
and i know i'm never falling out
of favor with you
i'm out here way beyond
a shadow of a doubt
and i know i'm never falling out
of favor with you
Saturday, October 22, 2005
Seven-Eighty on a Sunday Night
QOTD: "I don't want my mom to f#@$ me up....because I thnk it would be awkward and uncomfortable." ~ Maggie
No one has commented on dating yet. Come on people. I know you all have comments about dating, things you don't like, things you wish about dating. I want to know what people think. Am I alone in my thoughts on dating? Maybe there is something I hadn't thought about. If so, what? I know you all think about it. So, let's hear it. Comment anonymously if you don't want people to see your thoughts on it. Just speak up.
OQOTD: "I don't really pay any attention when people talk." ~ Adam
Taquitos are a wonderful thing, especially in flour tortilla variety. Mmmmmmmm.
Ever get to know a person in a completely different light than everyone else? So when everyone you can't stand this person, you give them a chance and actually like the person. You don't like a couple things they have done, but you're not a grudge person and think you would actually get along with them. Some people tell you how they are just a horrible person, but another wants to spend the rest of their life with them, so you are torn. Just makes you wonder sometimes.
So we tried out Real Hacienda tonight. Yeah that new one on Wabash. It was quite tasty I must say. And the main course came fast. And for the price they charge, I definately would recommend it to any mexican food lover.
Some people only continue to confuse me. Sometimes people seem to act different than they tell you, or at least it seems. So you start to wonder if you can trust what they tell you. Hmmmm.
Had a good talk with Caroline tonight. It was really nice. There are nights when that girl is a good talk. Still very confusing, but interesting. She has very different logic from anyone I know, making it harder to understand her sometimes, but she is still fun to talk to.
So apparently I am to list 5 random thing about me and then tag 5 more people. S here it goes I guess.
1. I am organized to max and the most unorganized person you will meet at the same time. With some things I am a mess, and many things I cannot keep things organized for the life of me. But at the same time I will organize things past organization to near OCD some times. Maybe it all depends on what it is.
2. I love to cook. It is almost a stress release for me. I can cook wonderful dishes and I am proud of it. The kitchen can be such a wonderful place for me some days, which is probably why I am so OCD about my kitchen.
3. I love to discover a new CD. And whn I discover it, I play it to the max. I pretty much will play a CD until either I am sick of it or it drives my roommates nuts, whichever comes first. That music will often set the tone for my week, so I like happy music better.
4. You can gain respect from me, rather fast initially. Maybe I'm naive, but after knowing you for a very short time, I will trust you with a lot. That is yours to lose. But once you lose it, good luck getting most of it back. You will probably never get all of it back, it will be hard as hell to get what you lost back at all. But initially, I'll put my neck on the line for you.
5. I love to performing and baseball. If that was all there was to life, I could quite possibly be completely content. On the performance end, it doesn't matter whether it is theatre, music, or simply making jokes with friends. I love having an audience. A packed crowd for a play just simply excites me to no end. I have never had stage fright. The bigger the audience the better. No one I think will ever understand my love for baseball. I take that back, my dad might. But no one around here. Very few things calm me like throwing a baseball. Hearing that crack of the mitt from a baseball hitting the pocket right. Swinging a bat at the ball. Watching it sail into the air. I love that. Especially watching that soaring ball you have just hit. It's a beautiful thing. That's what I love about batting practice over a game. You can swing away and just watch that baseball soar. Love it.
Now to tag. Jesseca, Sami (you both can do it in the form of a comment), Leslie, Crystal, and Katie.
I wasn't even gonna blog tonight, but I get some funny quotes and then just started writing and didn't stop. Speaking of which I did some new creative writing. Jesseca will be happy. :-D
Well I will leave you with a This Day And Age song that I was enjoying earlier today. Peace.
i still don't want to play your game you said the thrill has been lost and can't be regain you said you rather watch the
rain than think of me cuz it makes you feel so free
we'll walk past the memories i will wave as you turn away if i was talking to you and not writing this maybe i can show
you something you haven't seen my lips would fight my mind i say things at the right time
i'll still wait for you if thats what it took we could run into the future without a second look you said you rather
change the wind than think of me cuz you need room to breathe
if i was talking to you and not writing this maybe i can show you something you haven't seen my lips would fight my mind
i say things at the right time
No one has commented on dating yet. Come on people. I know you all have comments about dating, things you don't like, things you wish about dating. I want to know what people think. Am I alone in my thoughts on dating? Maybe there is something I hadn't thought about. If so, what? I know you all think about it. So, let's hear it. Comment anonymously if you don't want people to see your thoughts on it. Just speak up.
OQOTD: "I don't really pay any attention when people talk." ~ Adam
Taquitos are a wonderful thing, especially in flour tortilla variety. Mmmmmmmm.
Ever get to know a person in a completely different light than everyone else? So when everyone you can't stand this person, you give them a chance and actually like the person. You don't like a couple things they have done, but you're not a grudge person and think you would actually get along with them. Some people tell you how they are just a horrible person, but another wants to spend the rest of their life with them, so you are torn. Just makes you wonder sometimes.
So we tried out Real Hacienda tonight. Yeah that new one on Wabash. It was quite tasty I must say. And the main course came fast. And for the price they charge, I definately would recommend it to any mexican food lover.
Some people only continue to confuse me. Sometimes people seem to act different than they tell you, or at least it seems. So you start to wonder if you can trust what they tell you. Hmmmm.
Had a good talk with Caroline tonight. It was really nice. There are nights when that girl is a good talk. Still very confusing, but interesting. She has very different logic from anyone I know, making it harder to understand her sometimes, but she is still fun to talk to.
So apparently I am to list 5 random thing about me and then tag 5 more people. S here it goes I guess.
1. I am organized to max and the most unorganized person you will meet at the same time. With some things I am a mess, and many things I cannot keep things organized for the life of me. But at the same time I will organize things past organization to near OCD some times. Maybe it all depends on what it is.
2. I love to cook. It is almost a stress release for me. I can cook wonderful dishes and I am proud of it. The kitchen can be such a wonderful place for me some days, which is probably why I am so OCD about my kitchen.
3. I love to discover a new CD. And whn I discover it, I play it to the max. I pretty much will play a CD until either I am sick of it or it drives my roommates nuts, whichever comes first. That music will often set the tone for my week, so I like happy music better.
4. You can gain respect from me, rather fast initially. Maybe I'm naive, but after knowing you for a very short time, I will trust you with a lot. That is yours to lose. But once you lose it, good luck getting most of it back. You will probably never get all of it back, it will be hard as hell to get what you lost back at all. But initially, I'll put my neck on the line for you.
5. I love to performing and baseball. If that was all there was to life, I could quite possibly be completely content. On the performance end, it doesn't matter whether it is theatre, music, or simply making jokes with friends. I love having an audience. A packed crowd for a play just simply excites me to no end. I have never had stage fright. The bigger the audience the better. No one I think will ever understand my love for baseball. I take that back, my dad might. But no one around here. Very few things calm me like throwing a baseball. Hearing that crack of the mitt from a baseball hitting the pocket right. Swinging a bat at the ball. Watching it sail into the air. I love that. Especially watching that soaring ball you have just hit. It's a beautiful thing. That's what I love about batting practice over a game. You can swing away and just watch that baseball soar. Love it.
Now to tag. Jesseca, Sami (you both can do it in the form of a comment), Leslie, Crystal, and Katie.
I wasn't even gonna blog tonight, but I get some funny quotes and then just started writing and didn't stop. Speaking of which I did some new creative writing. Jesseca will be happy. :-D
Well I will leave you with a This Day And Age song that I was enjoying earlier today. Peace.
i still don't want to play your game you said the thrill has been lost and can't be regain you said you rather watch the
rain than think of me cuz it makes you feel so free
we'll walk past the memories i will wave as you turn away if i was talking to you and not writing this maybe i can show
you something you haven't seen my lips would fight my mind i say things at the right time
i'll still wait for you if thats what it took we could run into the future without a second look you said you rather
change the wind than think of me cuz you need room to breathe
if i was talking to you and not writing this maybe i can show you something you haven't seen my lips would fight my mind
i say things at the right time
Drive on a Saturday Night
So apparently I have been freaking out a few people with my blog. Well, don't worry I am fine. I often like to blog after something has happened to me and I am fuming. This is a release for me. If I have an issue with someone, I will talk to them about it, not simply just blog about it. I may blog about it first, but I will take it up with them once I am calm and can have a logical and rational conversation. I can't let something brew for very long without talk to the person about it. That's just how I am.
She looked great, like she always did. I'm not sure which was harder, the awkwardness of being together in the house, but not together, or to see how happy he made her just as I had once. It was nice to see the smile again, even though it did hurt.
Ever just want to go do something, but you don't want a lot of people around? I mean, I am a very social person. I love being around people, often the more the merrier. But tonight I just wanted to go somewhere with a close friend. That's it. I felt like a jerk though. Some times a guy just needs some personal time. Some time that you can just sit down and talk with someone and have a deep conversation, and that's tough with a large group. I never really get that any more unless I take a number and get scheduled in. Damn being busy.
So apparently when I brought up the dating issue a few posts back, and got a few interesting responses about it, but none in the form of a comment, and none of which as a well thought out statement of how you feel about it. So that's what I'd like to see here. We all have our opinions on how we think dating should go. I want to hear yours.
Watching Saving Private Ryan right now. Such a wonderful movie. If you ever watch that movie, I mean really watch that movie, and you know someone in the military, especially someone close, it can really get to you. Very moving. One quote sticks out to me, partially because it was quoted to me at Field Training, "Earn this." Every day we put on that uniform, representing the men and women who have died for our freedom, representing all that our military stands for, we were called to earn that honor, because yes, it is an honor. Those two words really move me and cause me to strongly consider still applying for OTS once I get my degree. I still stand at attention for the national anthem, I still take such pride in that flag.
Not much more to say. So I will just leave you with some Incubus. Great stuff.
Sometimes, I feel the fear of uncertainty stinging clear
And I can't help but ask myself how much I'll let the fear
Take the wheel and steer
It's driven me before
And it seems to have a vague, aunting mass appeal
But lately I am beginning to find that I
Should be the one behind the wheel
Whatever tomorrow brings, I'll be there
With open arms and open eyes
So if I decide to waiver my chance to be one of the hive
Will I choose water over wine and hold my own and drive?
It's driven me before
And it seems to be the way that everyone else gets around
But lately I'm beginning to find that
When I drive myself my light is found
So whatever tomorrow brings, I'll be there
With open arms and open eyes
Would you kill the Queen to crush the hive?
Would you choose water over wine
Hold the wheel and drive?
She looked great, like she always did. I'm not sure which was harder, the awkwardness of being together in the house, but not together, or to see how happy he made her just as I had once. It was nice to see the smile again, even though it did hurt.
Ever just want to go do something, but you don't want a lot of people around? I mean, I am a very social person. I love being around people, often the more the merrier. But tonight I just wanted to go somewhere with a close friend. That's it. I felt like a jerk though. Some times a guy just needs some personal time. Some time that you can just sit down and talk with someone and have a deep conversation, and that's tough with a large group. I never really get that any more unless I take a number and get scheduled in. Damn being busy.
So apparently when I brought up the dating issue a few posts back, and got a few interesting responses about it, but none in the form of a comment, and none of which as a well thought out statement of how you feel about it. So that's what I'd like to see here. We all have our opinions on how we think dating should go. I want to hear yours.
Watching Saving Private Ryan right now. Such a wonderful movie. If you ever watch that movie, I mean really watch that movie, and you know someone in the military, especially someone close, it can really get to you. Very moving. One quote sticks out to me, partially because it was quoted to me at Field Training, "Earn this." Every day we put on that uniform, representing the men and women who have died for our freedom, representing all that our military stands for, we were called to earn that honor, because yes, it is an honor. Those two words really move me and cause me to strongly consider still applying for OTS once I get my degree. I still stand at attention for the national anthem, I still take such pride in that flag.
Not much more to say. So I will just leave you with some Incubus. Great stuff.
Sometimes, I feel the fear of uncertainty stinging clear
And I can't help but ask myself how much I'll let the fear
Take the wheel and steer
It's driven me before
And it seems to have a vague, aunting mass appeal
But lately I am beginning to find that I
Should be the one behind the wheel
Whatever tomorrow brings, I'll be there
With open arms and open eyes
So if I decide to waiver my chance to be one of the hive
Will I choose water over wine and hold my own and drive?
It's driven me before
And it seems to be the way that everyone else gets around
But lately I'm beginning to find that
When I drive myself my light is found
So whatever tomorrow brings, I'll be there
With open arms and open eyes
Would you kill the Queen to crush the hive?
Would you choose water over wine
Hold the wheel and drive?
Tuesday, October 18, 2005
Pardon Me on a Tuesday Night
I wasn't ready for this. I thought I was. You would think I was. But I wasn't. At all. I was caught off guard and I don't know how to take it. Regardless, I will have to deal with it this weekend. I had a dream last night where I was posed with a question, and I had an answer. Which I think only made things worse.
[Later:] So amazingly pissed off right now. And it has nothing to do with the paragraph above. It is amazing how some people can be so amazngly inconsiderate to get so many people pissed off at them. And I refuse to see them as the victims either. You have got to be kidding me. I was so pissed off I was pacing outside. I could not stand to be in the same room. I went for a walk to let off some steam. I wil be amazed if they even care. Maybe this is what I needed to be inspired to write some lyrics to a song. Even Adam would like it. It would very angry and bitter, just how he likes music.
Mmmmm, Taco Bell, late at night, is such a wonderful thing. I wolfed down two tacos on the way back alone. Kinda calms the nerves.
So apparently I need to take a trip to the West Coast some time. It sounds like it could be fun. If you are on the West Coast and you want me to come visit you while I am there, let me know. I'll make a list. It's what I seem to be good at.
I really wish I had someone to pitch to right now. Nothing releases steam like throwing a baseball as hard as you can at someone. To hear the crack of that mitt, to feel the blood rush to the tips of your fingers, to hear that ball whistle as you release it. Brings me back to such a wonderful time. I miss it. I miss it a lot.
When I was little I had someone I could throw to: my little brother, Danny. We could just go out and play catch, and it was a wonderful time. We both loved the game, and I really miss that. Do you know how amazingly difficult to find someone around here that loves baeball like I do? Impossible.
Well, I think it is time for bed, so I will leave you with some Incubus. Enjoy.
A decade ago
I never thought I would be
At twenty three
On the verge of spontaneous combustion
Woe-is-me
But I guess that it comes With the territory
An ominous landscape of never ending calamity
I need you to hear
I need you to see
That I have had all I can take
And exploding seems like
A definite possibility to me
So pardon me while I burst into flames
I've had enough of the world
And it's people's mindless games
So pardon me while I burn
And rise above the flame
Pardon me, pardon me
I'll never be the same
Not two days ago
I was having a look
In a book and I saw a picture of a guy fried up above his knees
I said, "I can relate,"
Cause' lately I've been thinking of combustication as a welcomed vacation from
The burdens of the planet earth
Like gravity, hypocrisy, and the perils of being in 3-D
And thinking so much differently
So pardon me while I burst into flames
I've had enough of the world
And it's people's mindless games
So pardon me while I burn
And rise above the flame
Pardon me, pardon me
I'll never be the same
[Later:] So amazingly pissed off right now. And it has nothing to do with the paragraph above. It is amazing how some people can be so amazngly inconsiderate to get so many people pissed off at them. And I refuse to see them as the victims either. You have got to be kidding me. I was so pissed off I was pacing outside. I could not stand to be in the same room. I went for a walk to let off some steam. I wil be amazed if they even care. Maybe this is what I needed to be inspired to write some lyrics to a song. Even Adam would like it. It would very angry and bitter, just how he likes music.
Mmmmm, Taco Bell, late at night, is such a wonderful thing. I wolfed down two tacos on the way back alone. Kinda calms the nerves.
So apparently I need to take a trip to the West Coast some time. It sounds like it could be fun. If you are on the West Coast and you want me to come visit you while I am there, let me know. I'll make a list. It's what I seem to be good at.
I really wish I had someone to pitch to right now. Nothing releases steam like throwing a baseball as hard as you can at someone. To hear the crack of that mitt, to feel the blood rush to the tips of your fingers, to hear that ball whistle as you release it. Brings me back to such a wonderful time. I miss it. I miss it a lot.
When I was little I had someone I could throw to: my little brother, Danny. We could just go out and play catch, and it was a wonderful time. We both loved the game, and I really miss that. Do you know how amazingly difficult to find someone around here that loves baeball like I do? Impossible.
Well, I think it is time for bed, so I will leave you with some Incubus. Enjoy.
A decade ago
I never thought I would be
At twenty three
On the verge of spontaneous combustion
Woe-is-me
But I guess that it comes With the territory
An ominous landscape of never ending calamity
I need you to hear
I need you to see
That I have had all I can take
And exploding seems like
A definite possibility to me
So pardon me while I burst into flames
I've had enough of the world
And it's people's mindless games
So pardon me while I burn
And rise above the flame
Pardon me, pardon me
I'll never be the same
Not two days ago
I was having a look
In a book and I saw a picture of a guy fried up above his knees
I said, "I can relate,"
Cause' lately I've been thinking of combustication as a welcomed vacation from
The burdens of the planet earth
Like gravity, hypocrisy, and the perils of being in 3-D
And thinking so much differently
So pardon me while I burst into flames
I've had enough of the world
And it's people's mindless games
So pardon me while I burn
And rise above the flame
Pardon me, pardon me
I'll never be the same
Monday, October 17, 2005
Hoopes I Did It Again on a Mnday Afternoon
"Oh the drama." That has been the quote of the month it seems. It only continues to amaze me around here. Now don't get me wrong, I don't claim to be innocent of all the drama around me. I am just as guilty, but it only contiues to grow around here. I think I need to get away for a little. I talked about running away to Hawaii with a close friend, but those plans fell through. Hmm maybe just St. Louis will have to do.
I really hope my boys make it to the World Series. Especially now that I have a ticket.
Sometimes I wish we could just go abck to old fashioned dating. I mean, what ever happened to that? You would ask a girl out on a date. One date. Uno. Ein. Un. One. You go to a restaurant, go see a movie, and maybe go somewhere to talk afterwards, assuming you are enjoying the night so far. You get to know each other. One on one. The original dating rules apply, no kissing on the first date, etc... At the end of the night you decide whether or not you want a second date. If not, it ends right there and you go on your merry way. Otherwise you plan another date. There is no huge commitment, you're simply getting to know each other. After a couple dates, maybe you decide that you really like this person and want to date this person and this person only. This is called going steady. It is not a given when dating someone. You've been dating this person for a while and continue to love every moent with them and start thinking about the future, now it is getting a little serious. See? Don't you get it? It doesn't have to be smething serious right away. You can simply date someone. What a better way to get to know them?
People read too much into things sometmes. And maybe thats my fault. I sometimes try to be cryptic and sometimes it's easier to read than a billboard, so they think they can read it all. Not to mention being cryptic sparks curiousity. However this isn't gonna stop me from being cryptic.
I kinda blog in spurts. Maybe this affect my readership. But who knows.
Wow, talking to 9 people on AIM at the same time. And blogging. That should really be resumeable skill. It really shows my multitasking ability.
I started writing last night and was actually able to pull out some lyrics. Something I have been working on for a while now. I wanted my songs to have some meat to the lyrics, so I wanted to write about something I felt strongly about. Not Corona, sorry Adam.
I am really excited about the 24 hour play festival that we are bringing to Rose-Hulman. We are involving a lot of alumni in it, something that rather excites me. This is unique that we can involve alumni who live far away from here as they only have to commit to 24 hours and can often come visit for a weekend, no problem. Such a great alumni relations project, not to mention what a fun project in general. I just feed off the excitement others have for it, and often it is my excitement that gets them excited.
Some people only continue to confuse me. I mean I realize that some people you have to take nearly everything they say with a grain of salt, but I am continually confused.
Wel I think I will end on some appropriate Relient K. Yay Drama. That could be a TSAV shirt.
what's up dude?
i'm getting kind of bored
let's get some food
and then hit movies 4
what's going on?
whats up with all our friends?
let's start a rumor
just to find out where it ends
cause a small town is like a small stage
for teenagers and their drama
instead of playing shows, we'll be showing plays
like 90210 without the beverly hills
well, don't you think (don't you think), don't you think it's high time
that we never settle down (never settle down)
well, don't you think (don't you think), don't you think it's high time
that we get out of this town (get out of this town)
cause if we leave then we just might be okay
hoopes i did it again
i messed everything up, and i think i hurt my friends
hoopes i did it again
relationships that work are things that i can't comprehend
ohio has the flavor of a water chestnut
it's not too crazy and it's not the best but
we're not setting forest fires just out of boredom
i'd rather see a movie if in fact i can afford one
cause a small town is like a small stage
for teenagers and their drama
instead of playing shows, we'll be showing plays
like 90210 without the beverly hills
well, don't you think (don't you think), don't you think it's high time
that we never settle down (never settle down)
well, don't you think (don't you think), don't you think it's high time
that we get out of this town (get out of this town)
cause if we leave then we just might make a difference
and if we leave then we just might be okay
and i don't think it would hurt to get away
hoopes i did it again
i messed everything up, and i think i hurt my friends
hoopes i did it again
relationships that work are things that i can't comprehend
dan bakitus said i'm shallow
he said i've got no integrity
but, i don't know dan bakitus
and dan bakitus, he don't know me
cause we always say in canton
you can't enjoy (canton joy) yourself
well, there's truth to that
but may i add
it's not half bad
and never less than that
I really hope my boys make it to the World Series. Especially now that I have a ticket.
Sometimes I wish we could just go abck to old fashioned dating. I mean, what ever happened to that? You would ask a girl out on a date. One date. Uno. Ein. Un. One. You go to a restaurant, go see a movie, and maybe go somewhere to talk afterwards, assuming you are enjoying the night so far. You get to know each other. One on one. The original dating rules apply, no kissing on the first date, etc... At the end of the night you decide whether or not you want a second date. If not, it ends right there and you go on your merry way. Otherwise you plan another date. There is no huge commitment, you're simply getting to know each other. After a couple dates, maybe you decide that you really like this person and want to date this person and this person only. This is called going steady. It is not a given when dating someone. You've been dating this person for a while and continue to love every moent with them and start thinking about the future, now it is getting a little serious. See? Don't you get it? It doesn't have to be smething serious right away. You can simply date someone. What a better way to get to know them?
People read too much into things sometmes. And maybe thats my fault. I sometimes try to be cryptic and sometimes it's easier to read than a billboard, so they think they can read it all. Not to mention being cryptic sparks curiousity. However this isn't gonna stop me from being cryptic.
I kinda blog in spurts. Maybe this affect my readership. But who knows.
Wow, talking to 9 people on AIM at the same time. And blogging. That should really be resumeable skill. It really shows my multitasking ability.
I started writing last night and was actually able to pull out some lyrics. Something I have been working on for a while now. I wanted my songs to have some meat to the lyrics, so I wanted to write about something I felt strongly about. Not Corona, sorry Adam.
I am really excited about the 24 hour play festival that we are bringing to Rose-Hulman. We are involving a lot of alumni in it, something that rather excites me. This is unique that we can involve alumni who live far away from here as they only have to commit to 24 hours and can often come visit for a weekend, no problem. Such a great alumni relations project, not to mention what a fun project in general. I just feed off the excitement others have for it, and often it is my excitement that gets them excited.
Some people only continue to confuse me. I mean I realize that some people you have to take nearly everything they say with a grain of salt, but I am continually confused.
Wel I think I will end on some appropriate Relient K. Yay Drama. That could be a TSAV shirt.
what's up dude?
i'm getting kind of bored
let's get some food
and then hit movies 4
what's going on?
whats up with all our friends?
let's start a rumor
just to find out where it ends
cause a small town is like a small stage
for teenagers and their drama
instead of playing shows, we'll be showing plays
like 90210 without the beverly hills
well, don't you think (don't you think), don't you think it's high time
that we never settle down (never settle down)
well, don't you think (don't you think), don't you think it's high time
that we get out of this town (get out of this town)
cause if we leave then we just might be okay
hoopes i did it again
i messed everything up, and i think i hurt my friends
hoopes i did it again
relationships that work are things that i can't comprehend
ohio has the flavor of a water chestnut
it's not too crazy and it's not the best but
we're not setting forest fires just out of boredom
i'd rather see a movie if in fact i can afford one
cause a small town is like a small stage
for teenagers and their drama
instead of playing shows, we'll be showing plays
like 90210 without the beverly hills
well, don't you think (don't you think), don't you think it's high time
that we never settle down (never settle down)
well, don't you think (don't you think), don't you think it's high time
that we get out of this town (get out of this town)
cause if we leave then we just might make a difference
and if we leave then we just might be okay
and i don't think it would hurt to get away
hoopes i did it again
i messed everything up, and i think i hurt my friends
hoopes i did it again
relationships that work are things that i can't comprehend
dan bakitus said i'm shallow
he said i've got no integrity
but, i don't know dan bakitus
and dan bakitus, he don't know me
cause we always say in canton
you can't enjoy (canton joy) yourself
well, there's truth to that
but may i add
it's not half bad
and never less than that
Over Thinking on a Sunday Night
I should be going to bed right now, but I have too much on my mind for now. I've had some time to think this weekend and I think it may have only confused me more. Why can't I just figure a thing or two out. I'm tired of being in the dark all the time.
Elizabethtown was a good movie. I enjoyed it. I think a large part of it was that I could really relate with Orlando Bloom's character. I hate being the substitute. It's just a sick role to give someone. I could really relate when he found someone that completely wowed him, that he could really connect with and you know by day one, there is something special there, only to find that they are taken. This guy may be the best guy in the world, or he may be a total douchebag, but you don't want to break them up. It's not your place to do so. So you have to step aside and be the friend, all the while knowing you connect with her more than he does. You want to support her, because you have really taken to her, but you'd love it more if she would just dith him and go with you. But you can't say that, even if he's being a total jerk. No, she may think you have other motives and are just trying to break them up. And now you don't even have this awesme friend who have found.
If you are trying to figure out who I am talking about, good luck, because it has happened to me more time than a redneck can count, and that was a combined retelling.
Sometimes he just pisses me off and I don't think he means to, but it doesn't make me feel better.
So I'm thinking abot writing a soap opera about the drama in the house that I live in. We could call it the TH, or maybe Days of Our TSAV, or maybe just simply Three Saturns and a Volvo going for that Two Guys, a Girl and a Pizza Place feel, but then it would be more like a sitcom. I swear my house is the midwest version of the OC. Maybe I'll write a One Act about it. Call it the TH: Part 1->Abridged.
Yes, I wanted you to read it, it was not an accident.
The unknown scares me sometimes. I'm not talking the Unknown like the cosmos out there or anything, that more of intrigues me. No I am talking about when I have no clue as to what the future brings. As organized as I can be, I thrive on being organized. Having a plan. People were amazed at the lengths I went to to organize the tournament. And that's just natural for me. When I have a plan for the future, I am very at peace with where my life is. When something goes off plan and I don't have a new plan taking into account what happened, I stress. Plan = no stress and inversely, no plan = stress. I need to talk to certain people as to what the future holds for us. I'm pretty sure these people know who I am talking about.
A nice walk could do me some good. I love walks, especially with the right company.
Well I should sleep, so I will leave you with some good ole Relient K I've been listening to all day.
i was thinking
over thinking
cause there's just too many scenarios
to analayze
look in my eyes
cause you're my dream please come true
i was thinking
over thinking
about exactly how i'm not exactly him
i'll break my heart in two
more times than you could ever do
cause you're my dream please come true
cause i think way too much
on a one track mind
and you're so out of touch
cause i'm so far behind
i can't deny this anymore, the facts ignored all done before
and if there's one in this world,
you let me know you're not that girl
i was sinking
lower, sinking
cause i lost the things i held on to
they let me think a thought
a thought that i would know was not
of seeing my dream come true
i was thinking
over thinking
about how far i had let this go
one more guy/girl chiché
i know now you're just in the way
of me and my dream come true
cause i think way too much
on a one track mind
and you're so out of touch
cause i'm so far behind
i'm trying to make sense
out of all of this
while your fading scent
just slips through my grip
i can't deny this anymore, the facts ignored all done before
and if there's one in this world,
you let me know you're not that girl
don't touch the positive with the negative end
don't touch the positive with the negative end
cause after all of the sparks you're still alone in the dark
cause after all of the sparks you're left alone in the dark
i was thinking
over thinking
cause there's just too many scenarios
to think about
to figure out
if you're my dream please come true
Elizabethtown was a good movie. I enjoyed it. I think a large part of it was that I could really relate with Orlando Bloom's character. I hate being the substitute. It's just a sick role to give someone. I could really relate when he found someone that completely wowed him, that he could really connect with and you know by day one, there is something special there, only to find that they are taken. This guy may be the best guy in the world, or he may be a total douchebag, but you don't want to break them up. It's not your place to do so. So you have to step aside and be the friend, all the while knowing you connect with her more than he does. You want to support her, because you have really taken to her, but you'd love it more if she would just dith him and go with you. But you can't say that, even if he's being a total jerk. No, she may think you have other motives and are just trying to break them up. And now you don't even have this awesme friend who have found.
If you are trying to figure out who I am talking about, good luck, because it has happened to me more time than a redneck can count, and that was a combined retelling.
Sometimes he just pisses me off and I don't think he means to, but it doesn't make me feel better.
So I'm thinking abot writing a soap opera about the drama in the house that I live in. We could call it the TH, or maybe Days of Our TSAV, or maybe just simply Three Saturns and a Volvo going for that Two Guys, a Girl and a Pizza Place feel, but then it would be more like a sitcom. I swear my house is the midwest version of the OC. Maybe I'll write a One Act about it. Call it the TH: Part 1->Abridged.
Yes, I wanted you to read it, it was not an accident.
The unknown scares me sometimes. I'm not talking the Unknown like the cosmos out there or anything, that more of intrigues me. No I am talking about when I have no clue as to what the future brings. As organized as I can be, I thrive on being organized. Having a plan. People were amazed at the lengths I went to to organize the tournament. And that's just natural for me. When I have a plan for the future, I am very at peace with where my life is. When something goes off plan and I don't have a new plan taking into account what happened, I stress. Plan = no stress and inversely, no plan = stress. I need to talk to certain people as to what the future holds for us. I'm pretty sure these people know who I am talking about.
A nice walk could do me some good. I love walks, especially with the right company.
Well I should sleep, so I will leave you with some good ole Relient K I've been listening to all day.
i was thinking
over thinking
cause there's just too many scenarios
to analayze
look in my eyes
cause you're my dream please come true
i was thinking
over thinking
about exactly how i'm not exactly him
i'll break my heart in two
more times than you could ever do
cause you're my dream please come true
cause i think way too much
on a one track mind
and you're so out of touch
cause i'm so far behind
i can't deny this anymore, the facts ignored all done before
and if there's one in this world,
you let me know you're not that girl
i was sinking
lower, sinking
cause i lost the things i held on to
they let me think a thought
a thought that i would know was not
of seeing my dream come true
i was thinking
over thinking
about how far i had let this go
one more guy/girl chiché
i know now you're just in the way
of me and my dream come true
cause i think way too much
on a one track mind
and you're so out of touch
cause i'm so far behind
i'm trying to make sense
out of all of this
while your fading scent
just slips through my grip
i can't deny this anymore, the facts ignored all done before
and if there's one in this world,
you let me know you're not that girl
don't touch the positive with the negative end
don't touch the positive with the negative end
cause after all of the sparks you're still alone in the dark
cause after all of the sparks you're left alone in the dark
i was thinking
over thinking
cause there's just too many scenarios
to think about
to figure out
if you're my dream please come true
Thursday, October 13, 2005
Deep Enough to Dream on a Late Wednesday Night
Can't sleep right now. Maybe it's because I have a lot going through my head. I'm such a jerk sometimes and it drives me nuts. I feel like such a hypocrite. Why do I do the things I do sometimes? If anyone has an answer, let me know, I'm kinda curious. It drives me crazy sometimes, the things he does, but then again, am I any better? Let he who is without sin cast the first stone. I think I need some time to think. To get myself in order. Maybe having no one here for the next few days will be good for me. Give me some time to myself, and sort things through. I look forward to this weekend. When I will have time to just blast some music and drive for an hour or so.
So I may be going to the World Series. AS long as the Cardinals are there, so am I. See I won a raffle for the opportunity to buy the tickets. They are rather expensive, but to see my Cardinals in the World Seires, it is so worth it. I am rather excited about it. I can't wait.
The Cardinals, I may add, totally dominated tonight. It is great to see them doing so well. I really hope they keep it up and have a lot of momentum riding into the World Series. Should be a good NLCS. I'm not going to miss a game.
Well I think I'mm gonna try that whole sleeping thing again, so I will leave you with some Chris Rice that I have been enjoying a lot lately.
Lazy summer afternoon
Screened in porch and nothin' to do
I just kicked off my tennis shoes
Slouchin' in a plastic chair
Rakin' my fingers through my hair
I close my eyes and I leave them there
And I yawn, and sigh, and slowly fade away
Deep enough to dream in brilliant colors
I have never seen
Deep enough to join a billion people
For a wedding feast
Deep enough to reach out and touch
The face of the One who made me
And oh, the love I feel, and oh the peace
Do I ever have to wake up
Awakened by a familiar sound
A clumsy fly is buzzin' around
He bumps the screen and he tumbles down
He gathers about his wits and pride
And tries again for the hundredth time
'Cause freedom calls from the other side
And I smile and nod, and slowly drift away
Deep enough to dream in brilliant colors
I have never seen
Deep enough to join a billion people
For a wedding feast
Deep enough to reach out and touch
The face of the One who made me
And oh, the love I feel, and oh the peace
Do I ever have to wake up
'Cause peace is pouring over my soul
See the lambs and the lions playin'
I join in and I drink the music
Holiness is the air I'm breathin'
My faithful heroes break the bread
And answer all of my questions
Not to mention what the streets are made of
My heart's held hostage by this love
And these brilliant colors I have never seen
I join a billion people for a wedding feast
And I reach out and touch the face of the One who made me
And oh, the love I feel, and oh the peace
Do I ever have to wake up
So I may be going to the World Series. AS long as the Cardinals are there, so am I. See I won a raffle for the opportunity to buy the tickets. They are rather expensive, but to see my Cardinals in the World Seires, it is so worth it. I am rather excited about it. I can't wait.
The Cardinals, I may add, totally dominated tonight. It is great to see them doing so well. I really hope they keep it up and have a lot of momentum riding into the World Series. Should be a good NLCS. I'm not going to miss a game.
Well I think I'mm gonna try that whole sleeping thing again, so I will leave you with some Chris Rice that I have been enjoying a lot lately.
Lazy summer afternoon
Screened in porch and nothin' to do
I just kicked off my tennis shoes
Slouchin' in a plastic chair
Rakin' my fingers through my hair
I close my eyes and I leave them there
And I yawn, and sigh, and slowly fade away
Deep enough to dream in brilliant colors
I have never seen
Deep enough to join a billion people
For a wedding feast
Deep enough to reach out and touch
The face of the One who made me
And oh, the love I feel, and oh the peace
Do I ever have to wake up
Awakened by a familiar sound
A clumsy fly is buzzin' around
He bumps the screen and he tumbles down
He gathers about his wits and pride
And tries again for the hundredth time
'Cause freedom calls from the other side
And I smile and nod, and slowly drift away
Deep enough to dream in brilliant colors
I have never seen
Deep enough to join a billion people
For a wedding feast
Deep enough to reach out and touch
The face of the One who made me
And oh, the love I feel, and oh the peace
Do I ever have to wake up
'Cause peace is pouring over my soul
See the lambs and the lions playin'
I join in and I drink the music
Holiness is the air I'm breathin'
My faithful heroes break the bread
And answer all of my questions
Not to mention what the streets are made of
My heart's held hostage by this love
And these brilliant colors I have never seen
I join a billion people for a wedding feast
And I reach out and touch the face of the One who made me
And oh, the love I feel, and oh the peace
Do I ever have to wake up
Thursday, October 06, 2005
Sitting, Waiting, Wishing on a Thursday Afternoon
You know what grinds my gears? "The jealous type." I am sorry, but that's not an excuse for your boyfriend to be a dick. "It's not that he doesn't trust me, he just gets jealous easily." Then you need to talk to him about his trust issues. Especially in relationships that have been going on for a while. Just because your boyfriend has issues is not gonna change my friendship with you. If he won't accept your friends, he's not worth it. I'm sure the same applies to girls, but I've never had a girl be jealous that I am hanging out with their boyfriend.
Today is finally Lindsey's birthday. If you see her, tell her happy birthday. Happy 21st Birthday Lindsey. Come over tonight for your Birthday Massage. Which leads me to my next rant.
I feel like I am being used for my back massages. Like people only come over to hang out with me for hope of a back massage. I realize I give good back amssages and thank you for the compliment, but I want people to want to hang out with me because they enjoy my company, not because they could realy use a back massage. My massages are a privelege, not some right you have because you are my friend. I will give them on my own time when I feel like giving them.
(Stepping of soapbox)
I get to go golfing today!!! It is the first annual Sports Information Golf Outing. Gotta love it. And Kevin is covering the greens fees. Have I ever told you I love my job?
Well I think I will leave you with some Jack Johnson. Such an awesome song I love it. Dad, remind me to burn you a copy of the CD. I think you would like his style of music.
Now I was sitting waiting wishing
That you believed in superstitions
Then maybe you'd see the signs
But Lord knows that this world is cruel
And I ain't the Lord, no I'm just a fool
Learning loving somebody don't make them love you
Must I always be waiting waiting on you?
Must I always be playing playing your fool?
I sing ya songs I dance a dance
I gave ya friends all a chance
Putting up with them wasn't worth never having you
And maybe you been through this before
But its my first time
So please ignore
The next few lines cause they're directed at you
I cant always be waiting waiting on you
I cant always be playing playing your fool
I keep playing your part
But its not my scene
Wont this plot not twist?
I've had enough mystery.
Keep building me up, then shooting me down
Well im already down
Just wait a minute
Just sitting waiting
Just wait a minute
Just sitting waiting
Well if I was in your position
Id put down all my ammunition
I'd wondered why'd it taken me so long
But Lord knows that I'm not you
And If I was I wouldn't be so cruel
Cause waiting on love ain't so easy to do
Today is finally Lindsey's birthday. If you see her, tell her happy birthday. Happy 21st Birthday Lindsey. Come over tonight for your Birthday Massage. Which leads me to my next rant.
I feel like I am being used for my back massages. Like people only come over to hang out with me for hope of a back massage. I realize I give good back amssages and thank you for the compliment, but I want people to want to hang out with me because they enjoy my company, not because they could realy use a back massage. My massages are a privelege, not some right you have because you are my friend. I will give them on my own time when I feel like giving them.
(Stepping of soapbox)
I get to go golfing today!!! It is the first annual Sports Information Golf Outing. Gotta love it. And Kevin is covering the greens fees. Have I ever told you I love my job?
Well I think I will leave you with some Jack Johnson. Such an awesome song I love it. Dad, remind me to burn you a copy of the CD. I think you would like his style of music.
Now I was sitting waiting wishing
That you believed in superstitions
Then maybe you'd see the signs
But Lord knows that this world is cruel
And I ain't the Lord, no I'm just a fool
Learning loving somebody don't make them love you
Must I always be waiting waiting on you?
Must I always be playing playing your fool?
I sing ya songs I dance a dance
I gave ya friends all a chance
Putting up with them wasn't worth never having you
And maybe you been through this before
But its my first time
So please ignore
The next few lines cause they're directed at you
I cant always be waiting waiting on you
I cant always be playing playing your fool
I keep playing your part
But its not my scene
Wont this plot not twist?
I've had enough mystery.
Keep building me up, then shooting me down
Well im already down
Just wait a minute
Just sitting waiting
Just wait a minute
Just sitting waiting
Well if I was in your position
Id put down all my ammunition
I'd wondered why'd it taken me so long
But Lord knows that I'm not you
And If I was I wouldn't be so cruel
Cause waiting on love ain't so easy to do
Sunday, October 02, 2005
Never Know on a Sunday Night
So I have gotten tired of sitting on the side watching people bitch about Christians trying to "convert" people. Now I realize some people aren't "religious" or are really just simply afraid to be labeled with the word. But who would want to be labeled with that word in this day in age? It has such a negative connotation today that people seem to be defending how little they believe in something. But that's not what this rant is about. No, I am more sick and tired of people around me going on and on about how horrible and self-righteous these Christians must be to be trying to convert the world. And how stuck up must they be to think that what they believe is right and there is only one way to heaven. But have you ever thought about it from the stand point of a Christian. No not someone who has gone to church and knows a few things about the Bible, but someone who actually believes in that stuff. Well let me let you in on a few things, as someone who actually whole heartedly believes in it.
To begin with, we don't look down upon people with different beliefs. Much the contrary. See if we looked down upon those with different beliefs, why would we share our beliefs with them? Beliefs are still something you decide for yourself, otherwise they are no longer your beliefs. And when people begin to grow up, I strongly encourage everyone to question what they believe and why they believe and go and search out the truth. Because believing in something because you were told to is simply weak. How can you have faith, when you don't even know why you believe something, when there is no basis for your faith? Once again I get on a tangent. Anyway, we respect your beliefs, but we believe you are wrong if you have differing beliefs. Holy crap, that sounds incredibly condescending, doesn't it. Well, actually it's logical. If we think that we are right in our beliefs and believe without a doubt it is the truth and you believe something contrary, that means we believe that yours is wrong. It's not egotistical, it's proof by contradiction.
Now we believe that there is only one way to heaven, and that's through Jesus. Now for sake of argument, let's assume that's correct. Now if you don't believe that, that would mean you don't enter heaven with us. Now assuming heaven is this most wonderful place we will spend eternity, don't you think I may want to attempt to get you on the list too. It's like trying to get you on the list at a Pike party, but on a greater scale and I think heaven will be a little better than dancing in a room full of foam. So hmmmmmm, how can I get you on the list...oh, I know, I will share with you my views and why I believe what I do, make them into a pretty convincing argument so that you can see what I see. Maybe you will see what I see and make a much different conclusion, or maybe you simply don't care, but considering my views, I'm looking at eternity here. Maybe you're not, but respect my views, especially when arguing about Christians not respecting yours.
Now then there is the argument of forcing beliefs on you. I will never force mine upon you. I may question ours and present mine to you, but that means nothing of my respect for yours.
Okay, I am done with that rant, so you can stop rolling your eyes at me for being too "preachy" and making you a little uncomfortable. If you think I'm wrong, say something. Question my beliefs, I encourage it. And if I don't have an answer, I will search out for myself. Maybe there is something that I didn't see before and I'm wrong, or maybe not. But I give you my word right here to seek out the truth on anything.
On a completely unrelated note, I love Jack Johnson. I definitely think I found a new CD to fall in love with. It very much fits my mood right now.
Been talking with Killer a lot lately and it's been pretty nice. I really enjoy her and Maggie coming over to the house as often as they do. Adds well to our house. ;)
Urinetown was hilarious. It definitely had a Lucky Stiff feel to it. I liked it. And it had no political undertones to it, which it could have had plenty. This way, you don't offend people who have differing political beliefs when that's not the point of the show to begin with. Very smart.
Ever wish you could get your hands on that perception gun in Hitchhiker's Guide? I do. But not so people can finally see the way I see things, but so that and can why people are doing what they are. So I can see what has made them do what they do. Maybe if I can see it from their angle, I can better understand them.
Wallace and Gromit open on Friday, who's in?
Well, this is getting rather long, and I need sleep, so I will leave you with some Jack Johnson.
I hear this old story before
Where the people keep appealing for the metaphors
Don't leave much up to the imagination,
So I, wanna give this imagery back
But I know it just ain't so easy like that
So, I turn the page and read the story again
And again and again
It sure seems the same, with a diff. name
We're breaking and rebuilding
And we're growing
Always guessing
Never knowing
Shocking but we're nothing
We're just moments
We're Clever but we're clueless
We're just human
Amusing but confusing
Were trying but where is this all leading
Never Know
It all happened so much faster
Than you could say disaster
Wanna take a time lapse
And look at it backwards
From the last one
And maybe thats just the answer
That we're after
But after all
We're just a bubble in a boiling pot
Just one breath in a chain of thought
The moments just combusting
Feel certain but we'll never never know
Just seems the same
Give it a diff. name
We're beggin and we're needing
And we're trying and we're breathing
Never knowing
Shocking but we're nothing
We're just moments
We're Clever but we're clueless
We're just human
Amusing but confusing
Helping, we're building
And we're growing
Never Know
Knock knock on the door to door
Tell ya that the metaphor is better than yours
And you can either sink or swim
Things are looking pretty grim
If you dont believe in what this one feeding
Its got no feeling
So I read it again
And again and again
Just seems the same
Too many different names
Our hearts are strong our hands are weak
We'll always be competing never knowing
Never knowing
Shocking but we're nothing
We're just moments
We're Clever but we're clueless
We're just human
Amusing but confusing
But the truth is
All we got is questions
We'll Never Know
Never Know
Never Know
To begin with, we don't look down upon people with different beliefs. Much the contrary. See if we looked down upon those with different beliefs, why would we share our beliefs with them? Beliefs are still something you decide for yourself, otherwise they are no longer your beliefs. And when people begin to grow up, I strongly encourage everyone to question what they believe and why they believe and go and search out the truth. Because believing in something because you were told to is simply weak. How can you have faith, when you don't even know why you believe something, when there is no basis for your faith? Once again I get on a tangent. Anyway, we respect your beliefs, but we believe you are wrong if you have differing beliefs. Holy crap, that sounds incredibly condescending, doesn't it. Well, actually it's logical. If we think that we are right in our beliefs and believe without a doubt it is the truth and you believe something contrary, that means we believe that yours is wrong. It's not egotistical, it's proof by contradiction.
Now we believe that there is only one way to heaven, and that's through Jesus. Now for sake of argument, let's assume that's correct. Now if you don't believe that, that would mean you don't enter heaven with us. Now assuming heaven is this most wonderful place we will spend eternity, don't you think I may want to attempt to get you on the list too. It's like trying to get you on the list at a Pike party, but on a greater scale and I think heaven will be a little better than dancing in a room full of foam. So hmmmmmm, how can I get you on the list...oh, I know, I will share with you my views and why I believe what I do, make them into a pretty convincing argument so that you can see what I see. Maybe you will see what I see and make a much different conclusion, or maybe you simply don't care, but considering my views, I'm looking at eternity here. Maybe you're not, but respect my views, especially when arguing about Christians not respecting yours.
Now then there is the argument of forcing beliefs on you. I will never force mine upon you. I may question ours and present mine to you, but that means nothing of my respect for yours.
Okay, I am done with that rant, so you can stop rolling your eyes at me for being too "preachy" and making you a little uncomfortable. If you think I'm wrong, say something. Question my beliefs, I encourage it. And if I don't have an answer, I will search out for myself. Maybe there is something that I didn't see before and I'm wrong, or maybe not. But I give you my word right here to seek out the truth on anything.
On a completely unrelated note, I love Jack Johnson. I definitely think I found a new CD to fall in love with. It very much fits my mood right now.
Been talking with Killer a lot lately and it's been pretty nice. I really enjoy her and Maggie coming over to the house as often as they do. Adds well to our house. ;)
Urinetown was hilarious. It definitely had a Lucky Stiff feel to it. I liked it. And it had no political undertones to it, which it could have had plenty. This way, you don't offend people who have differing political beliefs when that's not the point of the show to begin with. Very smart.
Ever wish you could get your hands on that perception gun in Hitchhiker's Guide? I do. But not so people can finally see the way I see things, but so that and can why people are doing what they are. So I can see what has made them do what they do. Maybe if I can see it from their angle, I can better understand them.
Wallace and Gromit open on Friday, who's in?
Well, this is getting rather long, and I need sleep, so I will leave you with some Jack Johnson.
I hear this old story before
Where the people keep appealing for the metaphors
Don't leave much up to the imagination,
So I, wanna give this imagery back
But I know it just ain't so easy like that
So, I turn the page and read the story again
And again and again
It sure seems the same, with a diff. name
We're breaking and rebuilding
And we're growing
Always guessing
Never knowing
Shocking but we're nothing
We're just moments
We're Clever but we're clueless
We're just human
Amusing but confusing
Were trying but where is this all leading
Never Know
It all happened so much faster
Than you could say disaster
Wanna take a time lapse
And look at it backwards
From the last one
And maybe thats just the answer
That we're after
But after all
We're just a bubble in a boiling pot
Just one breath in a chain of thought
The moments just combusting
Feel certain but we'll never never know
Just seems the same
Give it a diff. name
We're beggin and we're needing
And we're trying and we're breathing
Never knowing
Shocking but we're nothing
We're just moments
We're Clever but we're clueless
We're just human
Amusing but confusing
Helping, we're building
And we're growing
Never Know
Knock knock on the door to door
Tell ya that the metaphor is better than yours
And you can either sink or swim
Things are looking pretty grim
If you dont believe in what this one feeding
Its got no feeling
So I read it again
And again and again
Just seems the same
Too many different names
Our hearts are strong our hands are weak
We'll always be competing never knowing
Never knowing
Shocking but we're nothing
We're just moments
We're Clever but we're clueless
We're just human
Amusing but confusing
But the truth is
All we got is questions
We'll Never Know
Never Know
Never Know
Tuesday, September 27, 2005
For Moments I Feel Faint on a Tuesday Afternoon
Ever been talked about as if you weren't there? Even when your head is resting on the person's shoulder? Ever have something criticized that you put a lot of value in, even in a simply joking way? Ever wonder if you could disappear and wonder if anyone notices, even if you make a lot of noise? If you have answered yes to any of these, I know how you feel. Well, that, and Ameritol may be right for you. Bug the crap out of your doctor about it so we can make another dollar.
Wow, in kind of a weird mood right now. I really can't explain it.
I'm getting tired of people criticizing religion so strongly around me. I don't know if people realize it bothers me, but I don't exactly hide it either.
I need to find a church here. I kind of feel like I am in a spiritual standstill, and I don't like it. Tere are some things I need to work on here. I know what they are, but knowing and doing are two totally different things.
My toe needs to heal, and fast. I found that I can be a sub and for free at a local bowling league. I miss bowling. Just losing everything around you for a couple hours. And that moment you step onto the lane, nothing else matters and everything fades away into a distant blur. Take a deep breath and throw the ball. I need to just lose myself sometimes and bowling is a great outlet. But until my toe heals, I don't have that.
Playing guitar last night with Nick was a lot of fun. I messed up the rhythm a few times, but I'm getting better. Flying Horses is such a fun song to play. I'm gonna start playing every night until my fingers hurt. Flying Horses was just what I needed. A song I can play and not sound retarded. I need to find words for the song I have written. I can feel them coming, but they aren't here yet. So I wait here in anticipation of being there in the moment. I wish I still had some of the songs I wrote before. They didn't have good music at all. but they were pretty good lyrically. Oh well, I shall be inspired again, once I know what I want to write about.
Well, I think I'll just leave you with some Relient K for good measures. Such an awesome song and great guitar. If you would like to hear it, let me know.
Am I at the point of no improvement?
What of the death I still dwell in?
I try to excel, but I feel no movement.
Can I be free of this unreleasable sin?
Never underestimate my Jesus.
You're telling me that there's no hope.
I'm telling you your wrong.
Never underestimate my Jesus
When the world around you crumbles
He will be strong, He will be strong
I throw up my hands
"Oh, the impossibilities"
Frustrated and tired
Where do I go from here?
Now I'm searching for the confidence I've lost so willingly
Overcoming these obstacles is overcoming my fear
Wow, in kind of a weird mood right now. I really can't explain it.
I'm getting tired of people criticizing religion so strongly around me. I don't know if people realize it bothers me, but I don't exactly hide it either.
I need to find a church here. I kind of feel like I am in a spiritual standstill, and I don't like it. Tere are some things I need to work on here. I know what they are, but knowing and doing are two totally different things.
My toe needs to heal, and fast. I found that I can be a sub and for free at a local bowling league. I miss bowling. Just losing everything around you for a couple hours. And that moment you step onto the lane, nothing else matters and everything fades away into a distant blur. Take a deep breath and throw the ball. I need to just lose myself sometimes and bowling is a great outlet. But until my toe heals, I don't have that.
Playing guitar last night with Nick was a lot of fun. I messed up the rhythm a few times, but I'm getting better. Flying Horses is such a fun song to play. I'm gonna start playing every night until my fingers hurt. Flying Horses was just what I needed. A song I can play and not sound retarded. I need to find words for the song I have written. I can feel them coming, but they aren't here yet. So I wait here in anticipation of being there in the moment. I wish I still had some of the songs I wrote before. They didn't have good music at all. but they were pretty good lyrically. Oh well, I shall be inspired again, once I know what I want to write about.
Well, I think I'll just leave you with some Relient K for good measures. Such an awesome song and great guitar. If you would like to hear it, let me know.
Am I at the point of no improvement?
What of the death I still dwell in?
I try to excel, but I feel no movement.
Can I be free of this unreleasable sin?
Never underestimate my Jesus.
You're telling me that there's no hope.
I'm telling you your wrong.
Never underestimate my Jesus
When the world around you crumbles
He will be strong, He will be strong
I throw up my hands
"Oh, the impossibilities"
Frustrated and tired
Where do I go from here?
Now I'm searching for the confidence I've lost so willingly
Overcoming these obstacles is overcoming my fear
Wednesday, September 21, 2005
Mood Rings on a Tuesday Night
So confused right now. Soooooooooooooooo friggin' confused. If I thought I was confused before, that was nothing. My brain hurts so much trying to figure this out. I just don't get it. Things need to be straightened out. I thought they were before, but now I'm not so sure. If you are female, and we are close, give me a call or come talk to me. I could use a female persepective on things.
So ISU nearly freaked me out today. I was checking my Award Information online to see where things were going to see that the amount I was getting from my Federal Stafford loan was less than half what they told me I was getting. Needless to say, I was pissed. I called the one competent counselor there to see what the hell was going on. He told me that he forgot to tell me that they had to wait on admissions to confirm that I was a full time student before they could officially approve me for that much, and since admissions takes so long to get back to them, he went ahead and approved me for the most he could for part-time and then I would get the rest once admissions cooperates. This way, I would at least get some of it soon since I have bills to pay. So instead of ISU screwing me over, like they had done so many times before, he was making it better for me, since they had lost my stafford loan paperwork anyway, he wanted to make it up to me. I am so glad I found this counselor. Someone that will work with you. I am no longer dealing with the ISU Financial Aid office as a whole, but going directly to this guy.
So it is now officially my dad's birthday. Happy Birthday Dad, and I will call you tonight. When is best to call?
Kinda tired and too confused to talk about much of anything else besides the enchiladas and tortilla soup was awesome. Now I will leave you with the most appropriate Relient K.
we all know the girls that i am talking about
well they are time bombs and they are ticking
and the only question's when they'll blow up
and they'll blow up; we know that without a doubt
cause they're those girls, yeah you know those girls that let their emotions get the best of them
and i've contrived some sort of a plan to help my fellow man
let's get emotional girls to all wear mood rings
so we'll be tipped off to when they're ticked off
cause we'll know just what they're thinking
cause what they're thinking...
she's so pretty but she but doesn't always act that way
her mood's out swinging on the swing set almost every day
she said to me that she's so happy it's depressing
and all i said was "someone get that girl a mood ring"
if it's drama you want then look no further
they're like the real world meets boy meets world meets days of our lives
and it just kills me how they get away with murder
they'll anger you then bat their eyes; those pretty eyes that watch you sympathize
and i've contrived some sort of a plan to help my fellow man
let's get emotional girls to all wear mood rings
so we'll be tipped off to when they're ticked off
cause we'll know just what they're thinking
cause what they're thinking...
she's so pretty but she but doesn't always act that way
her mood's out swinging on the swing set almost every day
she said to me that she's so stressed out that it's soothing
and all i said was "someone get that girl a mood ring"
cause when it's black (it) means watch your back because you're probably
the last person in the world right now she wants to see
and when it's blue it means that you should call her up immediately
and ask her out because she'll most likely agree
and when it's green it simply means that she is really stressed
and when it's clear it means she's completely emotionless (and that's all right i must confess)
we all know the girls that i am talking about
she liked you wednesday but now it's friday and she has to wash her hair
and it just figures that we'll never figure them out
first she's jekyll and then she's hyde....at least she makes a lovely pair
mood ring oh mood ring
oh tell me will you bring
the key to unlock this mystery
of girls and their emotions
play it back in slow motion
so i may understand the complex infrastructure known as the female mind
So ISU nearly freaked me out today. I was checking my Award Information online to see where things were going to see that the amount I was getting from my Federal Stafford loan was less than half what they told me I was getting. Needless to say, I was pissed. I called the one competent counselor there to see what the hell was going on. He told me that he forgot to tell me that they had to wait on admissions to confirm that I was a full time student before they could officially approve me for that much, and since admissions takes so long to get back to them, he went ahead and approved me for the most he could for part-time and then I would get the rest once admissions cooperates. This way, I would at least get some of it soon since I have bills to pay. So instead of ISU screwing me over, like they had done so many times before, he was making it better for me, since they had lost my stafford loan paperwork anyway, he wanted to make it up to me. I am so glad I found this counselor. Someone that will work with you. I am no longer dealing with the ISU Financial Aid office as a whole, but going directly to this guy.
So it is now officially my dad's birthday. Happy Birthday Dad, and I will call you tonight. When is best to call?
Kinda tired and too confused to talk about much of anything else besides the enchiladas and tortilla soup was awesome. Now I will leave you with the most appropriate Relient K.
we all know the girls that i am talking about
well they are time bombs and they are ticking
and the only question's when they'll blow up
and they'll blow up; we know that without a doubt
cause they're those girls, yeah you know those girls that let their emotions get the best of them
and i've contrived some sort of a plan to help my fellow man
let's get emotional girls to all wear mood rings
so we'll be tipped off to when they're ticked off
cause we'll know just what they're thinking
cause what they're thinking...
she's so pretty but she but doesn't always act that way
her mood's out swinging on the swing set almost every day
she said to me that she's so happy it's depressing
and all i said was "someone get that girl a mood ring"
if it's drama you want then look no further
they're like the real world meets boy meets world meets days of our lives
and it just kills me how they get away with murder
they'll anger you then bat their eyes; those pretty eyes that watch you sympathize
and i've contrived some sort of a plan to help my fellow man
let's get emotional girls to all wear mood rings
so we'll be tipped off to when they're ticked off
cause we'll know just what they're thinking
cause what they're thinking...
she's so pretty but she but doesn't always act that way
her mood's out swinging on the swing set almost every day
she said to me that she's so stressed out that it's soothing
and all i said was "someone get that girl a mood ring"
cause when it's black (it) means watch your back because you're probably
the last person in the world right now she wants to see
and when it's blue it means that you should call her up immediately
and ask her out because she'll most likely agree
and when it's green it simply means that she is really stressed
and when it's clear it means she's completely emotionless (and that's all right i must confess)
we all know the girls that i am talking about
she liked you wednesday but now it's friday and she has to wash her hair
and it just figures that we'll never figure them out
first she's jekyll and then she's hyde....at least she makes a lovely pair
mood ring oh mood ring
oh tell me will you bring
the key to unlock this mystery
of girls and their emotions
play it back in slow motion
so i may understand the complex infrastructure known as the female mind
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