Man oh man, it's getting close to opening night and I'm getting nervous. This show is really coming through though. I am very proud of all of my cast and all they have done for this production. The best part of this show is just simply watching so many of these kids grow as actors, a real sense of accomplishment. They are like my kids, my first students. I guess teachers will always have a special place in their heart for their first class, as I will this cast. I accidentally walked in on them getting together a director's gift, or at least the money. See Vinh (rhymes with "pin") decided to hold a "cast meeting" to get everyone together to discuss this, forgetting I am apart of the cast too. So someone told me he was having a cast meeting, I went to go see what he wanted. He feel kinda bad that I kinda ruined the surprise, but it made my night that they would make an effort. I didn't really expect anything at all. I just loved being able to do what I love, theatre.
A promise or a dare
I would jump if I knew you'd catch me
Staring over the edge
I can't tell if you'll be here for me
I close my eyes and make a wish
Turn out the lights and take a breath
Pray that when the wick is burned
You would say that it's all about love
So most of my co-workers are on call right now. See apparently they are expecting the Pope to die real soon and when that happens, we have to send out this letter of some sort to all Catholics everywhere. They even already have this letter made, this is how sure they are that the Pope will be dying soon. See he's currently in the hospital and I guess doctors don't expect him to make it through the night. I have no idea. Although it did make me wonder, how do they choose the next Pope? Is he elected? Bloodline? I have no idea.
You were there when I needed you
You were there when the skies broke wide, wide open
You were there when I needed you
You were there when the skies broke wide, wide open
So most of you know about my True Love Waits ring, and most everyone I know even supports it. I have never gotten crap for it, and most respect it about me. That is until I started working where I do now. A Catholic organization. Of all the places, I thought this would be the place I got the most support for it. It is so weird. Most everyone that I work with either laugh at me and then ask if I'm gay, or ask why on earth I would do that and just don't get it and keep giving me crap for it anyway. It confuses the crap out of me. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
Need sleep. Play opens tomorrow, wish me luck. I will leave you with a link and some Jars of Clay. Oh and I am very sly. Bonus points if you can see why. Oh and bonus points still for finding the contest on my blog and doing it. Peace.
I remember you said
Love was more than your good intentions
Empty boxes on the floor
Things I never asked you for
I pray that when the wick is burned
You would say that it's all about love
I can't see the promise of
Excuses you fall upon
I pray to God not holding on
To things you've left undone
Thursday, February 24, 2005
Tuesday, February 22, 2005
You Already Take Me There on a Tuesday Afternoon
Need a good laugh during finals time? This actually happened to my big bro, Baldauff. All I have to say is the "The Bisquik is in the mixer."
Not much for this post, maybe more later, but I thought people would get a kick out of the story. I may never be able to leave Kroger the same. Here is some Switchfoot to end on.
When all I have in on the floor
Divided, divided
When I'm a world away from peace
Behind Your eyes is where I know
I'll find it, I'll find it
'Cause who You are defines my dreams
You already take me there
Heaven in the here and now
When I'm a broken hearted man
Complacent and tired
When I've been knocked out of the race
I've been a fool for long enough
To fight it, to fight it
It's in Your arms I find my place
You meet me where I am
Forgive me where I am
Where I lose myself in grace
(When I'm lost and found)
I wanna lose myself in grace
Let Your love reign down all over me
Cover me
Not much for this post, maybe more later, but I thought people would get a kick out of the story. I may never be able to leave Kroger the same. Here is some Switchfoot to end on.
When all I have in on the floor
Divided, divided
When I'm a world away from peace
Behind Your eyes is where I know
I'll find it, I'll find it
'Cause who You are defines my dreams
You already take me there
Heaven in the here and now
When I'm a broken hearted man
Complacent and tired
When I've been knocked out of the race
I've been a fool for long enough
To fight it, to fight it
It's in Your arms I find my place
You meet me where I am
Forgive me where I am
Where I lose myself in grace
(When I'm lost and found)
I wanna lose myself in grace
Let Your love reign down all over me
Cover me
Sunday, February 20, 2005
Hello McFly on a Sunday Night
So I had a great time in the Haute this weekend. I love all of my Rose-Hulman people and cannot wait to be back. Hopefully I will have a strong case for readmission. It's crazy sometimes. I even miss the final stress, although finals time was always a rather relaxing time for me. By the end of the term I normally have it or I don't. I review the stuff to make sure it is fresh on my mind, but comapred to the normal stress of constant homework in every class and figuring out how to get it all done in the allotted time, finals are cake. At least during finals you have had a taste of the tests now and you can study for one at a time and not worry about the next, unless you have a couple back to back finals, but even then you only have to study for two at once when during the normal schedule, you are working on 5 homeowrk assignments in one night. Not to mention you keep telling yourself, I can do this, only X hours left, and the end is in sight and when you finish that final, it is all over and out of your hands, and so much weight is simply lifted off your shoulders. Yeah, finals time is a great time and for once, I actually miss it.
My mother is signing me up for an appointment with a doctor about the possibility of my having Adult ADD. I think I may have a slight case of. I don't think I ever had it as bad as my little brother had it, but I would not be surprised the least bit if I do have at least a mild case of ADD.
Cynical, just your way
You play the doubting thomas
Feel the scars and wipe the stains
So you fight, and retreat
And talk yourself out of believing
In any peace that you can’t see
You're logical, you can’t find
Any reason to believe in love
You are blind
So, my computer, like me, prefers Rose to home. I take it to Rose to get fixed and I go to back up my important docs onto Adam's external hard drive. I get that done, and am rather impressed that it hasn't crashed on me yet as it had so many times before. So I keep it on, so I can show Nick better what happened. And it does great. So I leave it on, and use it all Friday and then on to Saturday. In fact now it is not only working, but going faster than it had before. So I'm thinking awesome, it just needed a decent rest and it's fine. I pack it up and take home since it no longer needs to see IAIT. Turn it on at home and get this nice "Non-system disk error" message, the beautiful black screen of death. I think to myself, I think I have gotten this message a couple other times before. Hmmmmmmmm, when was that? Oh yeah the other times my hard drive flipped me off before falling on its sword. I press any button like it says but it continues to flash this fateful screen at me taunting me, so I try a nice Ctl-Alt-Del and it restarts and guess what screen it comes back to 10 second into boot up? Yup, thats right, nice black screen of death. So turns out this hard drive at seen its last days. What is with the Compaq hard drives and being total crap? I have gone through four in two and a half years. That means on average these hard drives are lasting less than 8 months. Thats pitiful. And I'm not the only one with this problem, I hear it's a common thing with Rose student who has a Compaq. What can I do to help preserve my hard drive so it doesn't crap out on me on such a regualr basis?
It seems it’s always the crazy times
You find you’ll wake up and realize
It takes more than your saline eyes
To make things right
So bonus points to the person to find the contest I posted on my facebook a while ago. Even more bonus points to the person to win the contest and post it here.
So props to the people who made my weekend so awesome. I don't want to name names here as I am bound to forget someone, and if you made my weekend, you know who you are. Especially the person who I had car troubles for, you make it worth it all and more.
I don't have much but I'll leave you with some old school Relient K.
A roll of the dice
A slip of the tongue
I was stirring up the hornets' nest
and finally got me stung
Said I'd do the right thing
But the wrong was done
It's over, exuse my grammer
But the fat lady sung
And I wish I was Michael J Fox
I'd visit the past
Then come back to the future (Hello McFly)
When I cleaned up my act
Yeah I don't know
What went through my head
Was my conscience shot?
Was it left for dead?
I said I'm sorry
But no one heard
'cause actions (actions) actions
Actions speak louder than words
I think I made God angry
and I'm sure that he's irate
I just hope my remorse was not too little too late
Even my track record
He gave me a clean slate
I'm forgiven and I'm livin'
With no sin on my plate
My mother is signing me up for an appointment with a doctor about the possibility of my having Adult ADD. I think I may have a slight case of. I don't think I ever had it as bad as my little brother had it, but I would not be surprised the least bit if I do have at least a mild case of ADD.
Cynical, just your way
You play the doubting thomas
Feel the scars and wipe the stains
So you fight, and retreat
And talk yourself out of believing
In any peace that you can’t see
You're logical, you can’t find
Any reason to believe in love
You are blind
So, my computer, like me, prefers Rose to home. I take it to Rose to get fixed and I go to back up my important docs onto Adam's external hard drive. I get that done, and am rather impressed that it hasn't crashed on me yet as it had so many times before. So I keep it on, so I can show Nick better what happened. And it does great. So I leave it on, and use it all Friday and then on to Saturday. In fact now it is not only working, but going faster than it had before. So I'm thinking awesome, it just needed a decent rest and it's fine. I pack it up and take home since it no longer needs to see IAIT. Turn it on at home and get this nice "Non-system disk error" message, the beautiful black screen of death. I think to myself, I think I have gotten this message a couple other times before. Hmmmmmmmm, when was that? Oh yeah the other times my hard drive flipped me off before falling on its sword. I press any button like it says but it continues to flash this fateful screen at me taunting me, so I try a nice Ctl-Alt-Del and it restarts and guess what screen it comes back to 10 second into boot up? Yup, thats right, nice black screen of death. So turns out this hard drive at seen its last days. What is with the Compaq hard drives and being total crap? I have gone through four in two and a half years. That means on average these hard drives are lasting less than 8 months. Thats pitiful. And I'm not the only one with this problem, I hear it's a common thing with Rose student who has a Compaq. What can I do to help preserve my hard drive so it doesn't crap out on me on such a regualr basis?
It seems it’s always the crazy times
You find you’ll wake up and realize
It takes more than your saline eyes
To make things right
So bonus points to the person to find the contest I posted on my facebook a while ago. Even more bonus points to the person to win the contest and post it here.
So props to the people who made my weekend so awesome. I don't want to name names here as I am bound to forget someone, and if you made my weekend, you know who you are. Especially the person who I had car troubles for, you make it worth it all and more.
I don't have much but I'll leave you with some old school Relient K.
A roll of the dice
A slip of the tongue
I was stirring up the hornets' nest
and finally got me stung
Said I'd do the right thing
But the wrong was done
It's over, exuse my grammer
But the fat lady sung
And I wish I was Michael J Fox
I'd visit the past
Then come back to the future (Hello McFly)
When I cleaned up my act
Yeah I don't know
What went through my head
Was my conscience shot?
Was it left for dead?
I said I'm sorry
But no one heard
'cause actions (actions) actions
Actions speak louder than words
I think I made God angry
and I'm sure that he's irate
I just hope my remorse was not too little too late
Even my track record
He gave me a clean slate
I'm forgiven and I'm livin'
With no sin on my plate
Sunday, February 13, 2005
More Than Useless on a Sunday
So my computer is dead. And along with it, an awesome update that I had. Very, very grrrrsome. There is so much I had to write here that was gonna make you not mind the wait so much, because it was just that awesome. But now it's gone, and it is very sad.
(Think to the tune of "Poor Jud is Daid" from "Oklahoma!")
Poor Compaq is daid, pore Compaq Evo is daid;
All gather 'round his coffin now and cry.
He had a heart of gold and he wasn't very old,
Oh, why did such a fella have to die.
So this weekend I went and saw Lewis Black at the Pageant in the Lou. He is a very funny guy, and it was definately a good time. Erika came down to see it, and in return I helped her with her GREs, well the math section at least. I would be screwed as far as the english section goes, but she's the english major, so together we could obliterate the test. We saw it with Ryan, and his girlfriend Erin, Cole and his girlfriend Lisa, and Matt and his brother Ryan. Ryan looked so much thinner than I had remembered him that I barely recognized him. Before the show we all met at Fitz's (where else?) and I had one of the best Coney's prepared on earth. The only place I can imagine them being better, well, would be at Coney Island, where they originated, but they may even have there beat. And fresh draft Fitz's root beer is the liquid thats close enough to heaven. I absolutely love it. After the show, most people went home, but Erika and I went to Denny's to get some nice breakfast late at night (when else?) and just get to talk. I love getting to simply talk to that girl. It can just be so random, crazy, intelligent, fun, deep and friggin hilarious all at the same time. We saw Josh Weidler which is always interesting. That guy thinks so highly of himself very much of the time, and rather cocky, but can somehow pull off likeable every once in a while. As long as we aren't talking about him, we can have some fun time together. And then Ian Randall came walking in. Now thats a fun guy, and about as completely random is they get sometimes. He's prolly the only white guy on earth that can pull off the fro like he does. He and Kyle are putting together another 24 hour play festival and they want me to be apart. How can I resist? It will be on a weekend, so even if I am back at Rose, I can come down to the B-Ville for it. I had such a blast on the previous one, I would be insane to say, no not this time.
So I took the Intermediate Java Programming course at University of Missouri-St. Louis, and well, it was all review. I didn't learn one thing. No I take that back, I learn case switch loops, as we never used them in CS 120, but that is it. And it all could have been done in an if statement just as easy if not easier. Anyway, all it did for me was refreh me mind on Java. That's it. So I paid over $300 for a refresher. And my father wanted me to take the Intro to Java class, doubting that I had learned everything they were going to cover in the Intro class. After talking with the prof, turns out, I've already learned all the Advanced Java Programming stuff as well, so there was nothing more they could teach me in Java. Is that sad or what? What the hell classes am I supposed to take here?? Why take a class that isn't gonna mean squat in my degree?
I get the horrible feeling that I'm not gonna get back in this spring. I have have sent a couple emails to Dr. Graves, the head of the board trying to figure out if I am on the right path to be back in the spring and if not, what else can I do? Basically he gave me thing they like to see, big one being an A or B in a couple complete classes at a local college or something, showing long term commitment. I don't have that long. So I found a class that met in the little time I'm here before spring term. He just doesn't seem to get it. I am working my butt off here. I want to be back at Rose more than anything in this world and knowing it's my very last chance, I will do anything I need to do to get there and stay. There is no better medicine in motivation to stay in school than living at home for 3 months. On the bright side, I now for sure have a place I can live in the spring. Zach and Aydrian have offered to let me stay at their house, so it will be nice and then I will have the apartment with Nick, Adam and hopefully Mike next year.
So fall back on all of your premonitions
And just learn to listen
To those that have more wisdom than you
And just stop
Putting so much stock
In all of this stuff
Live your life for those you love
Relient K is such an awesome band. I wasn't a huge fan of their latest CD, but it has definately grown on me. Still not a big fan of a couple songs, but I love many others on it.
And lately the weather
Has been so Bi-polar
And Consequently so have I
And now I'm sunny with a High of 75
Since You took my heavy heart
And made it light
And its funny how you find
You enjoy your life
When you're happy to be alive
So I apologize for not being able to update much lately, these next few posts are gonna suck until I get my computer back so that I can just write stuff that pops into my head, and actually have meat to my blogs, so bear with me. It's ahrd to be able to get a good post when you are fighting for time on this computer. So if you don't feel like checking that often for the next couple of weeks, I totally understand.
I am a hostage to my own humanity
Self detained and forced to live in this mess I’ve made
And all I’m asking is for You to do what You can with me
But I can’t ask You to give what You already gave
So I was going through an old folder of mine and I found this:
Just a Little Something Girls Should Know About Guys
1. We're NOT as big of perverts as you think we all are.
2. No matter what you say, your ex-boyfriend IS an ass.
3. We like you to give us hugs and kisses too.
4. Don't argue with us when we call you beautiful.
5. Don't treat us like shit.
6. We know you're pretty, that's one of the reason's we're going out with you.
7. Don't go into detail about your period. It scares us.
8. If you have cramps and we ask you what's wrong, just say it's that time of the month and nothing more.
9. If you really liked us for us, you would let us think that our mustache, beard, or sideburns looked cool.
10. We'll never shave our legs. So get over it.
11. NEVER ask us if you can put make up on us. It's just wrong.
12. Don't make bets about us, because one of your friends will tell us, if you don't.
13. When we tell you that you're not fat, believe us.
14. We absolutely do not care about, The Backstreet Boys, NSYNC, 98 degrees, or what any other guy looks like for that matter.
15. We may not be able to pee accurately all of the time, but at least we can stand up and pee.
16. Just because you think you're always right, doesn't mean you don't have to apologize when you're wrong.
17. You expect us to say and do sweet things for you, but it would be nice if you did the same every once in a while.
18. We can't always be spontaneous, so try to help us make the plans sometimes.
19. Don't ask us to beat up another guy for you, because you might get what you wish for.
20. Never kick us in the nuts "just to see what we'd say."
21. Never pretend like you are going to break up with us and laugh when we believe you.
22. Pamela Anderson's boobs aren't fake anymore, but we like yours better anyway.
23. Size doesn't matter, except to idiots who don't want a relationship.
24. PMS is not an excuse.
25. If you want us to put the seat down when we're done, you should put it up when you're done.
26. Don't tell us how cute your ex-boyfriend was. That doesn't turn us on.
27. Always remember: The way to a guy’s heart is through his stomach...and maybe...oh never mind.
28. NEVER ask us to kiss other guys. You might be that comfy with your friends, but to us it’s just wrong.
29. We always notice how funny it is after your rip out our heart, stick it down our throat, and still want to be friends.
30. And last but not least: We know you're not always right, but we'll pretend like you are anyway.
I found it quite humorous, even though I don't completely agree with all of them, but many of them are soo true. ::Cough:: 5! 13! 24! ::cough::
I think I will follow the trend I have set in this post and end with some Relient K. If you haven't heard these guys, you are totally missing out, and you have not heard Relient K, till you have heard them live.
I feel like, I would like
To be somewhere else doing something that matters
And I'll admit here, while I sit here
My mind wastes away and my doubts start to gather
Whats the purpose? It feels worthless
So unwanted like I've lost all my value
I can't find it, not in the least bit
and I'm just scared, so scared that I'll fail you
And sometimes I think that I'm not any good at all
And sometimes I wonder why, why I'm even here at all
But then you assure me
I'm a little more than useless
And when I think that I can't do this
You promise me that I'll get through this
And do something right
Do something right for once
So I say if I can't, do something significant
I'll opt to leave most opportunities wasted
And nothing trival, that life could give me will
Measure up to what might have replaced it
Too late look, my date book
Is packed full of days that were empty and now gone
And I bet, that regret
Will prove to get me to improve in the long run
I’m a little more than useless
And I never knew I knew this
Was gonna the day, gonna be the day
That I would do something right
Do something right for once
I notice, I know this
Week is a symbol of how I use my time
Resent it, I spent it
Convincing myself the world's doing just fine
Without me
Doing anything of any consequence
Without me
Showing any sign of ever making sense
Of my time , it's my life
And my right, to use it like I should
Like he would, for the good
Of everything that I would ever know
(Think to the tune of "Poor Jud is Daid" from "Oklahoma!")
Poor Compaq is daid, pore Compaq Evo is daid;
All gather 'round his coffin now and cry.
He had a heart of gold and he wasn't very old,
Oh, why did such a fella have to die.
So this weekend I went and saw Lewis Black at the Pageant in the Lou. He is a very funny guy, and it was definately a good time. Erika came down to see it, and in return I helped her with her GREs, well the math section at least. I would be screwed as far as the english section goes, but she's the english major, so together we could obliterate the test. We saw it with Ryan, and his girlfriend Erin, Cole and his girlfriend Lisa, and Matt and his brother Ryan. Ryan looked so much thinner than I had remembered him that I barely recognized him. Before the show we all met at Fitz's (where else?) and I had one of the best Coney's prepared on earth. The only place I can imagine them being better, well, would be at Coney Island, where they originated, but they may even have there beat. And fresh draft Fitz's root beer is the liquid thats close enough to heaven. I absolutely love it. After the show, most people went home, but Erika and I went to Denny's to get some nice breakfast late at night (when else?) and just get to talk. I love getting to simply talk to that girl. It can just be so random, crazy, intelligent, fun, deep and friggin hilarious all at the same time. We saw Josh Weidler which is always interesting. That guy thinks so highly of himself very much of the time, and rather cocky, but can somehow pull off likeable every once in a while. As long as we aren't talking about him, we can have some fun time together. And then Ian Randall came walking in. Now thats a fun guy, and about as completely random is they get sometimes. He's prolly the only white guy on earth that can pull off the fro like he does. He and Kyle are putting together another 24 hour play festival and they want me to be apart. How can I resist? It will be on a weekend, so even if I am back at Rose, I can come down to the B-Ville for it. I had such a blast on the previous one, I would be insane to say, no not this time.
So I took the Intermediate Java Programming course at University of Missouri-St. Louis, and well, it was all review. I didn't learn one thing. No I take that back, I learn case switch loops, as we never used them in CS 120, but that is it. And it all could have been done in an if statement just as easy if not easier. Anyway, all it did for me was refreh me mind on Java. That's it. So I paid over $300 for a refresher. And my father wanted me to take the Intro to Java class, doubting that I had learned everything they were going to cover in the Intro class. After talking with the prof, turns out, I've already learned all the Advanced Java Programming stuff as well, so there was nothing more they could teach me in Java. Is that sad or what? What the hell classes am I supposed to take here?? Why take a class that isn't gonna mean squat in my degree?
I get the horrible feeling that I'm not gonna get back in this spring. I have have sent a couple emails to Dr. Graves, the head of the board trying to figure out if I am on the right path to be back in the spring and if not, what else can I do? Basically he gave me thing they like to see, big one being an A or B in a couple complete classes at a local college or something, showing long term commitment. I don't have that long. So I found a class that met in the little time I'm here before spring term. He just doesn't seem to get it. I am working my butt off here. I want to be back at Rose more than anything in this world and knowing it's my very last chance, I will do anything I need to do to get there and stay. There is no better medicine in motivation to stay in school than living at home for 3 months. On the bright side, I now for sure have a place I can live in the spring. Zach and Aydrian have offered to let me stay at their house, so it will be nice and then I will have the apartment with Nick, Adam and hopefully Mike next year.
So fall back on all of your premonitions
And just learn to listen
To those that have more wisdom than you
And just stop
Putting so much stock
In all of this stuff
Live your life for those you love
Relient K is such an awesome band. I wasn't a huge fan of their latest CD, but it has definately grown on me. Still not a big fan of a couple songs, but I love many others on it.
And lately the weather
Has been so Bi-polar
And Consequently so have I
And now I'm sunny with a High of 75
Since You took my heavy heart
And made it light
And its funny how you find
You enjoy your life
When you're happy to be alive
So I apologize for not being able to update much lately, these next few posts are gonna suck until I get my computer back so that I can just write stuff that pops into my head, and actually have meat to my blogs, so bear with me. It's ahrd to be able to get a good post when you are fighting for time on this computer. So if you don't feel like checking that often for the next couple of weeks, I totally understand.
I am a hostage to my own humanity
Self detained and forced to live in this mess I’ve made
And all I’m asking is for You to do what You can with me
But I can’t ask You to give what You already gave
So I was going through an old folder of mine and I found this:
Just a Little Something Girls Should Know About Guys
1. We're NOT as big of perverts as you think we all are.
2. No matter what you say, your ex-boyfriend IS an ass.
3. We like you to give us hugs and kisses too.
4. Don't argue with us when we call you beautiful.
5. Don't treat us like shit.
6. We know you're pretty, that's one of the reason's we're going out with you.
7. Don't go into detail about your period. It scares us.
8. If you have cramps and we ask you what's wrong, just say it's that time of the month and nothing more.
9. If you really liked us for us, you would let us think that our mustache, beard, or sideburns looked cool.
10. We'll never shave our legs. So get over it.
11. NEVER ask us if you can put make up on us. It's just wrong.
12. Don't make bets about us, because one of your friends will tell us, if you don't.
13. When we tell you that you're not fat, believe us.
14. We absolutely do not care about, The Backstreet Boys, NSYNC, 98 degrees, or what any other guy looks like for that matter.
15. We may not be able to pee accurately all of the time, but at least we can stand up and pee.
16. Just because you think you're always right, doesn't mean you don't have to apologize when you're wrong.
17. You expect us to say and do sweet things for you, but it would be nice if you did the same every once in a while.
18. We can't always be spontaneous, so try to help us make the plans sometimes.
19. Don't ask us to beat up another guy for you, because you might get what you wish for.
20. Never kick us in the nuts "just to see what we'd say."
21. Never pretend like you are going to break up with us and laugh when we believe you.
22. Pamela Anderson's boobs aren't fake anymore, but we like yours better anyway.
23. Size doesn't matter, except to idiots who don't want a relationship.
24. PMS is not an excuse.
25. If you want us to put the seat down when we're done, you should put it up when you're done.
26. Don't tell us how cute your ex-boyfriend was. That doesn't turn us on.
27. Always remember: The way to a guy’s heart is through his stomach...and maybe...oh never mind.
28. NEVER ask us to kiss other guys. You might be that comfy with your friends, but to us it’s just wrong.
29. We always notice how funny it is after your rip out our heart, stick it down our throat, and still want to be friends.
30. And last but not least: We know you're not always right, but we'll pretend like you are anyway.
I found it quite humorous, even though I don't completely agree with all of them, but many of them are soo true. ::Cough:: 5! 13! 24! ::cough::
I think I will follow the trend I have set in this post and end with some Relient K. If you haven't heard these guys, you are totally missing out, and you have not heard Relient K, till you have heard them live.
I feel like, I would like
To be somewhere else doing something that matters
And I'll admit here, while I sit here
My mind wastes away and my doubts start to gather
Whats the purpose? It feels worthless
So unwanted like I've lost all my value
I can't find it, not in the least bit
and I'm just scared, so scared that I'll fail you
And sometimes I think that I'm not any good at all
And sometimes I wonder why, why I'm even here at all
But then you assure me
I'm a little more than useless
And when I think that I can't do this
You promise me that I'll get through this
And do something right
Do something right for once
So I say if I can't, do something significant
I'll opt to leave most opportunities wasted
And nothing trival, that life could give me will
Measure up to what might have replaced it
Too late look, my date book
Is packed full of days that were empty and now gone
And I bet, that regret
Will prove to get me to improve in the long run
I’m a little more than useless
And I never knew I knew this
Was gonna the day, gonna be the day
That I would do something right
Do something right for once
I notice, I know this
Week is a symbol of how I use my time
Resent it, I spent it
Convincing myself the world's doing just fine
Without me
Doing anything of any consequence
Without me
Showing any sign of ever making sense
Of my time , it's my life
And my right, to use it like I should
Like he would, for the good
Of everything that I would ever know
Sunday, February 06, 2005
Be My Escape on a Sunday
Apprently there is a Blog Commenter's Committee, and they have decided that I update. They even IMed me, and interesting enough a lot of them don't comment on my blog. So people who don't even read this blog decided I needed to update. If you want me to update, leave comments. That shows me a lot of people have read and are loking for something new.
So I've been planning an update for sometime now, but things seem to just come up. A long update is coming, but since I need sleep, here is a little something wet your whistle until tomorrow night. So here are some lyrics from Relient K's latest album, "MmmHmm". That title reminds me of Who's on First.
"So whatcha listening to?"
"MmmHmm."
So here's the lyrics that definately spoke to me on my random road trip to Eastern (Kiki you rock)
I’ve given up on giving up slowly
I’m blending in so you won’t even know me
Apart from this whole world that shares my fate.
This one last pull that you mention
It’s my one last shot at redemption
Cause I know to live you must give your life away.
And I’ve been housing all this doubt
and insecurity
And I’ve been locked inside that house
All the while you hold the key
And I’ve been dying to get out
And that might be the death of me.
And even though there’s no way of knowing
Where to go
I promise I’m goin because…
I gotta get out of here
I’m stuck inside this rut that I feel into by mistake
I gotta get out of here
And I’m begging you, I’m begging you, I’m begging you to be my escape.
I’ve given up on doing this alone now
Guess I failed and I’m ready to be shown how
You told me the way and now I’m tryin to get there
And this life sentence that I’m serving
I admit that I’m every bit deserving
But the beauty of grace is that it makes life not fair
I am a hostage to my own humanity
Self-detained and forced to live in this mess I’ve made
And all I’m asking is for you to do what you can with me
But I can’t ask you to give what you already gave.
I fought you for so long I should have let you win
(Oh how we regret those things we do)
And all I was trying to do was save my own skin
(But so were you)
So were you
So I've been planning an update for sometime now, but things seem to just come up. A long update is coming, but since I need sleep, here is a little something wet your whistle until tomorrow night. So here are some lyrics from Relient K's latest album, "MmmHmm". That title reminds me of Who's on First.
"So whatcha listening to?"
"MmmHmm."
So here's the lyrics that definately spoke to me on my random road trip to Eastern (Kiki you rock)
I’ve given up on giving up slowly
I’m blending in so you won’t even know me
Apart from this whole world that shares my fate.
This one last pull that you mention
It’s my one last shot at redemption
Cause I know to live you must give your life away.
And I’ve been housing all this doubt
and insecurity
And I’ve been locked inside that house
All the while you hold the key
And I’ve been dying to get out
And that might be the death of me.
And even though there’s no way of knowing
Where to go
I promise I’m goin because…
I gotta get out of here
I’m stuck inside this rut that I feel into by mistake
I gotta get out of here
And I’m begging you, I’m begging you, I’m begging you to be my escape.
I’ve given up on doing this alone now
Guess I failed and I’m ready to be shown how
You told me the way and now I’m tryin to get there
And this life sentence that I’m serving
I admit that I’m every bit deserving
But the beauty of grace is that it makes life not fair
I am a hostage to my own humanity
Self-detained and forced to live in this mess I’ve made
And all I’m asking is for you to do what you can with me
But I can’t ask you to give what you already gave.
I fought you for so long I should have let you win
(Oh how we regret those things we do)
And all I was trying to do was save my own skin
(But so were you)
So were you
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